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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

What to do if my(19M) father(44M) is having affair with neighbour(44F) ??? Please help!!

4 replies

RajJ12 · 17/08/2024 19:20

We are family of four, myself, sister, father and mother(43F), and I am studying away from my hometown, thus visit home rarely and sister(12F) is young and childish. Our neighbours are a family of three, aunt, uncle(46M), and their son(20M). Both my father and uncle takes care our their families very well and also help each other's family. I am their son's best friend and share a close bond. Mom and uncle are also very good friends and mom is a home maker and uncle works from home. My father works at IT industry and aunt works at a school near his industry. Aunt loves me like a mother and so does my mom to my friend (aunt's son). We are just like one family.
It all started when one day I visited the neighborhood home and saw my aunt scrolling her email. Hey email id was [email protected]. I was very shocked but did not show anything. Usually at nights it's usual that both our families meet up and cheer. I observed my father sharing a very close bond with my aunt, so does my uncle to my mom. My father used to pull her hand, wipe his hand with her cloth etc.... but my mom and uncle are just friends and just have fun teasing each other. As both my uncle and mom are at home they help each other and my mom cooks for uncle daily. One day when I came home from my hostel, my father was waiting in his car with to pick me up. I somehow wanna surprise him thus came hiding behind the car only to find out aubt was with him sitting in the front seat near my father. I said I will drive the car and asked my father to get down. As he got down and went to back seat and aunt too did the same. While I was driving back home they sat very close to each other, not even a foot gap between them. I started doubting now....
And finally in another event, when both families were enjoying that evening, mom and uncle were having a serious conversation in a room and in the balcony of neighbour's home I almost caught dad and aunt kissing...
I talked about this to my neighbor's son, he said that are just enjoying and they are 40+ and need some relaxation. He even said he feels my mom and his father are attracted.
Now I don't know what to do as I am far from my home... If at home I can control the situations. I can never say my aunt and uncle are disobedient as they take care of my like their son and I see my aunt like another mother. My friend says the same, and asks me to just don't involve and let the four of them enjoy.... I even doubt if my father married my aunt...
I need your suggestion and I am completely blank

OP posts:
Fiery30 · 17/08/2024 19:28

In what way would you control the situation? You have no idea about the ins and outs of your parents' and neighbours' relationship. They are adults and are free to do as they please and most certainly don't need you to be the moral police. The words you use such as disobedient are quite immature. I understand you are very young but take a step back. If there is something that has made you uncomfortable, speak to either parent in a mature manner, without being judgemental. What is your concern? Is your sister doing ok? If you don't want to do so, then you need to stay out of this situation.

Skybluepinky · 17/08/2024 19:29

Just keep yr nose out, the messenger always comes out worse off.

Shouldbedoing · 17/08/2024 19:32

I'm afraid you just need to look out for your little sister and wait for the fallout

NoLongerNHS · 17/08/2024 19:55

You dont know what is happening and it is none of your business. The respective spouses can see as much as you do - it is up to them to address any concerns they have about their marriages.

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