I need to leave him

[lydiaGate]

Long story shortish ..
I'm 5 months pregnant.

When I fell pregnant me & partner where looking at houses together but he showed some changes so I have kept my own house.

He snaps at me so much over tiny tiny things. If I cry he tells me he can't deal with "emotional people" he tells me he deserves better than me pretty often and tells me he's sick of me.

My self esteem is SO low. A good friend of mine is a glamour model.. after we had a disagreement, he went online and liked her photos to upset me & has liked other girls too. I've never ever been insecure but he has made me. So now when he speaks to female "friends" and I mention anything he calls me controlling and weird.
I feel like I'm living in some sort of delusion fantasy world. He's told me I'm a loser. I'm ugly. I'll never be anybody.

Then he's nice again. Buys lavish gifts for me, comes and does my garden, takes me out etc all until I step out of line again in his eyes and the abuse comes. I don't know who I am. The woman he adores or the woman he can't stand?
He'll buy stuff, then when the abuse comes he tells me I "owe him loads of cash" I just don't understand

I've told him today it's over. I can't stand any more from him. I hate how I feel. He says I'm pathetic & over the top and ridiculous. I know deep down I'm not.

He's told me I'm way too needy yet I ask him for nothing. I just can't understand it

I have a great mum & dad who another me in love even though I'm a big girl so I do have support but it doesn't stop me feeling so empty & ugly x

He is showing you the nice/nasty cycle of abuse which is a continuous one. This abusive man is projecting his own self onto you to bring you down. He’s the nobody etc here not you. He targeted you here to abuse you.

am glad you’ve told him it’s over. I would consider obtaining a non moleststion order against him going forward. Do not fall for any attempts to hoover you back in like flowers, his tears or promises to change.

Thankfully you have kept your property, are you living there now?. Tell your midwife about the abuse and contact Womens Aid. Remember always that the only acceptable level of abuse in a relationship is none.
Look also at the Freedom Programme and do this online or in person. Your boundaries here need work because he has gone a long way to break those, that is also where the Freedom Programme could help too. Use the support of your family and friends and give this child your surname. Abuse thrives on secrecy, bust this wide open.