Still no divorce!

[Harriet1456]

Cheating, abusive husband - separated for two years - coparenting as amicably as possible. He had two affairs and ended things in a horrible manner so there’s no going back in time. I have asked now on three occasions when divorce proceedings will
start (he has much more financial recourse to do so than me as I am a SAHM with four primary children). His last reply was he wasn’t emotionally strong enough! Will I be the one having to start proceedings?!

Yes. He has no reason to get divorced and is delaying while preparing.

Which country are you in?

If you are in England or Wales you can do the divorce online for just under £600. You must NOT do the final bit (originally decree absolute) until the financial consent has been signed off by a judge. This means if you start the divorce you get control over the last part. If he starts it he could apply for the absolute without the finances being sorted.

I would do the divorce online. But see a solicitor and/or mediator for the finances. Depending on how amicable he is you could jointly decide on the children.

Make sure you have collated together all the information you need and then just file .
my experience is that some people have very little incentive to sort the practical and financial matters and will just delay forever .
if you want to be divorced , take control !

Why have you not instigated? A single
mom of four kids will be entitled to financial aid.

Apply online, get lawyered up.

My ex was upset when I applied, saying he thought he had more time. No, mate, no messing around, let's get it over with. He's not a nice person, despite how he presents himself to the outside world.

Thankfully once he came to terms with the fact I was deadly serious, he and I managed to sort it out with little legal intervention.

These men think they have the upper hand. But it doesn't have to be this way. Make the first move.

Contact Women's aid for advice.
This is controlling behaviour.

no that’s not correct. Legal aid only for domestic abuse situations nowadays as well as a financial means test