Why is online dating so shit!?

[BloodyWolves]

Decided two weeks ago to attempt online dating again. It’s so bad I’d laugh if it wasn’t so depressing!

Man number 1; chatted for a morning and decided to meet for a coffee. Great! Asked him when he was free and selected a day. He said ‘great, we’ll arrange something’ and never heard from him again!

Man number 2; he wasn’t even a match! A guy who I chatted to years ago from a previous online dating attempt must have seen me because suddenly I got loads of Instagram likes from his burner account. He’s actually engaged… hence the abrupt end of our talking the first time around. I ignored him and he reappears as a new account on the site with a brand new name and a pair of sunglasses. You couldn’t make it up!

Man number 3; decides to go into great detail about how his ex was completely at fault for their breakup… she apparently didn’t give him enough decent blowjobs 🤨

Man number 4; seemed lovely! Was sending long, articulate messages and I felt my luck had changed. Ghosted.

Man number 5; similar to number 4. Seemingly lovely guy! Seemed really keen to meet. Planned to hopefully meet tomorrow but he has a work thing today so he’d let me know. Talked about how he couldn’t believe his luck that he was chatting to me. Told me he was on the shorter side (genuinely doesn’t bother me!) and I told him my height. Felt a shift after that and I haven’t heard from him today so I’m guessing tomorrow isn’t happening. Actually disappointed at that one!

This is without all the unsolicited messages from guys 15-20 years older. Guys who I haven’t matched with. Guys who live 200 miles away! Ones who open a conversation with ‘hey’, seriously please give me something to work with!

It feels bloody hopeless!

Why not consider planned dating groups. Where it is an organized person to person gathering. You meet many and get to chat in person. Then at the end of the night if that person would like to contact you they ask the organizer for your contact. Plus you have to request that person also. It removes many problems.
First you pay to go - so eveyone has skin in the game. Second you are meeting them up front in a safe group envirornment. Forget the phoney dating aps.

Another suggestion - join membership groups where you have an opportunity to meet new people. You may meet a gal who has a brother who is single. Think of activies that would assist you to meet people. Tennis clubs, church clubs.
Think about volunteering - such as a dog shelter or rescue club. At least meeting people where you both have the same interest. Look to you local library to see what is on their agenda. There are many creative ways to meet new people. In person, the old fashioned way.

As someone who’s been on and off dating apps for the last 18 months I’d love to tell you it gets better - but but really doesn’t 🤣🤣

Me and my single friends all got 100’s of stories like your OP.

Everybody knows it's shit but they keep going back on and then complain, that it's shit

Give it time you will meet someone lovely x

I gave up years ago! Are there still LOADS of people called Simon?!

I specifically remember one profile with a guy proudly holding his jacket open to reveal a t-shirt saying "show me your twat".

Who said romance was dead?

Because nice, normal people generally prefer to meet people face to face, in real life.

Oh hello again @BloodyWolves 😊

I agree with @MrsSkylerWhite to be honest. IME men on dating apps are on there for the wrong reasons in most cases. I was on there for the wrong reasons - felt lonely and bored and wanted some validation and to socialise with people near me. For many people it's the first stop after coming out of a relationship and they haven't properly 'done the work', they think chatting to women and seeing what happens is the fix they need at that time.

So these are some of the reasons why it's so rubbish.

What I did and what kind of worked for me making my profile invisible and only swiping right on the 3-4 men I genuinely liked and fitted with based on properly reading their profile. I'd heard gen pop can be quite dreadful as you say so decided I'll hand-pick them myself.

How old are you, out of interest, and what age range are you looking for? And what made you decide to go for OLD?

Why do people put themselves through it? It's all players and incels.

What about going out to stuff?

My son's highly eligible but I can't imagine for a moment he's got the time to spend trawling the Internet. He runs, goes to the gym, volunteers on a Saturday, cooks, and meets his mates for games nights. When his neighbour goes on holiday he walks and cares for her dog. He often says he speaks to more girls he doesnt know when he's with the dog than any other time!

So, maybe get a dog? Or just do nice things and don't worry.