name change. Dp acting strange.

[unsettled]

I've name changed as this is a little personal.

Dp and I generally have a very good relationship, however, I'm almost ready to give birth, and he is quite often working nights at a tourist thing.

Recently, he's been a little off with me and he keeps saying things like 'shut up' and acting like he just cannot be arsed with me which upsets me, particularly as I'm over hormonal.

Obviously I worry about him working at a touristy thing with lots of lasses, but I don't for a second think he'd give anyone else the time of day, so I'm not too bothered. However, he keeps whinging at me for texting all the time and asking who it is and what they've said. Nowt to hide, so that's fine with me. He seems to be texting all the time lately, which doesn't bother me.

But today he was moaning about me txting and I was whinging that he doesn't trust me, and he didn't even deny it! So I said 'Oh My God I can't believe you don't' and he didn't say anything.

He also keeps going on about 'all women being the same' as he's been cheated on and hurt in the past. he hasn't said anything like that for about a year since we first got together!

Well I'm not the same. I'd never cheat.

So what's going on??

If you're about to give birth perhapse he's worried and feels like he can't say anything. He's going into defensive mode because he doesn't know what to do ??

There's nothing so annoying as someone being in the same room as you whilst texting and smirking at the responses but not sharing them.

Sometimes people I know do it even while we are in the middle of a discussion

Or sitting down to eat

And they don't say "oh, excuse me...i'd better answer that" they just do it and smirk.

Maybe he's feeling a little like I do?

Or - on the otherhand - he's an annoying fool?

How long have you been together?

Imminent births can get people tense and worried and then people can show that in all sorts of weird ways. The 'all wone = same' is infuriating and odd. Is it at all possible that if he'd read your messages he could have read one that sounded a bit suspicious? To a suspicious mind.

I don't know what to suggest, except not to text all the time. Of course, why the hell should you stop texting? but if you just phoned whoever you are texting and got the whole conversation over and done with, he would stop worrying.

In the long run though, I think you've got your work cut out for you. This type of behaviour can seem quite flattering at first, but it soon becomes very hard work.

I don't know, I could make a case for you to be worried about who he's suddenly texting but really, it's the telling you to shut up that is not on. Seriously. If my husband told me to shut up I'd dump a drink on his head. Or at least I'd draw myself up with a very withering "HOW DARE YOU."

Just for fun, take a look at his recent texts. Might be a reason he's suddenly jealous. The guilty often project.

Yes, I agree that the guilty often project

but, has he had a knock to his confidence lately? Perhaps he is bringing up the "bad old times" in his head???

Or he is very stressed about the baby, is worried about money, the change a baby brings...?
Maybe he feels a bit resentful that you will need "supporting"

DSC, I never knew quite how to phrase that so elegantly, but agree wholeheartedly. Xh used to do this to me the whole time, accusing me of doing the very things he was doing.
Hope this is not the case here, though, unsettled. You have enough to deal with at present.

agree about the guilty projecting....good way to put it.
How hard for you though especially as about to give birth. How many other children do you have?

Uuuhm, I would point out that your hardly likely to be swinging from the chandeliers at the moment!
I used to text constantly before I gave birth, I was bored and I wasn't very mobile with back pain/sheer weight and uncomfortableness of the 'bump'.
I would ask him why he doesn't trust you and point out that you need his support/compassion/love more than ever at this stage.
Good luck on the upcoming event.

He's been a bit more lovey dovey last night and today. I don't know if 'm just feeling insecure because I'm big, fat and pregnant at the moment and I can't imagine him possibly liking me like this. So that's my problem really.

I touched on him cheating today as I had a bad dream about it last night and he said he hopes I don't think he is because that's totally not the case and he seemed a little hurt that I'd even thought it.

We don't read each others txts, not out of dodgyness, but we've just sort of trusted each other from v early on and it was sort of a sign of this.

We've been together just over a year now. It's both our first baby.

I think he is very worried about money at the mo as he can't seem to get a decent enough job and he wants to be a provider for me and the baby. He's also working ridiculous hours.

He just seems very defensive and fed up of me at the moment, but then a few minutes later he'll be lovely and I'll think why was I worrying??!!

I asked why he's so shouty and he said he just can't stand work and it's getting him down.

I have cute pics of us together on my phone and he said 'why are they on there? We're meant to be past the lovey dovey stage now, we're getting married soon!! We're meant to be at the having a laugh married couple stage!!' So maybe I'm just being childish and overly gooey at the mo? But I would quite like the affection to stay how it used to be because it was so lovely and I really need it at the moment as I feel so insecure.

Baby imminent (I'm guessing first for both of you) - both worried and stressed and your lives being about to change and turn upside down.

I would be extremely surprised if it was any more than that.

It's a big change and it's bound to set you both on edge a bit, especially if he is worrying about work/money.