Has anyone ever lost a partner due to their mental health?

[overandoveransover]

by lost I don’t mean death. My partner and I broke up two years ago for many reasons related to his mental health. In all of this time we’ve never managed to fully let each other go. We’ve tried to consider fixing things but it’s never been taken forward (due to him) and his mental health hasn’t improved. I don’t know how to come to terms with losing the person I love the most for reasons so out of my control. He’s equally devastated. Does anyone have similar experiences I could hear? I’m permanently so sad at the loss. It’s so hard to lose someone when you both stillnlove each other

A lot of what you are saying sounds familiar.

It feels a lot like the person(ality) you fell in love with has died but their body is still here, and occasionally glimpses of this wonderful person come back and it gives you hope.

Or like watching someone suffer from any other terminal illness, with no real cure or treatment plan to make them better. Like your happiness as a couple is on pause all the time with the hope that maybe it'll get unpaused sometime soon.

I wanted to stick by him but he effectively didn't let me. I thought I'd never move past losing someone that still loved me and was still alive, but I couldn't be with. But surprisingly I did move past it.

PM if you want as I don't really want to engage with too many details on here.

Mine hung himself. A note by his side from 6 months before so it had been planned for a while. I am so sorry I have no positive words to add. Ultimately I’d say: put your own oxygen mask on first and >> you can’t pour from an empty cup. Don’t let his issues hold you back from living your own life. I have a friend who did and she’s devastated at having missed to have kids etc but she spent years propping her mentally ill ex up only for him to cheat on her.

I’m so sorry for you, and him

I’ve DMed