Feeling sad and could use a sense check/hand hold. Been with dp for just over a year. We were both newly separated and i think we got together too soon, there's been a lot of drama and conflict, he is hot headed and has a blunt attitude where he questions everything and often seems annoyed if i don't agree with him (e.g. on when he should meet my dc as he says a year is very long, or if i dont agree on frequency of contact/communication between us etv). We have also been long distance for a few months now due to work. I've become sick of arguing as it seems like almost every phone convo turns into a row. I thought he realised how much his argumentative streak was killing us as he promised not to start a row with me for the whole of July, but.... when we finally met up after 6 weeks apart, he got in a mood because i hadnt introduced him to family i'd been staying with (although they live 2 hr drive away from where we were meeting) and he said he didnt want to spend the weekend with me anymore, which felt so mean after so long apart and looking forward to it. Also when i called his bluff he totally reneged and begged me not to leave.
But then, within just a few days, something else happened. He is meant to be coming to stay near me for the summer and we've been planning it as he can't stay with me when my dc are with me, but I sent him a text saying I'd booked him a nice airbnb my treat for a few nights to cover this period, and then he said i was being controlling and 'i didnt even ask him', even though it was supposed to be a nice thing, to ensure he had a comfortable place to say. He also argued with me about a throwaway comment i made when we talked about sex, about how i don't like someone.. erm, 'finishing' anywhere near my face (as i hate porn-y stuff like that) and he took offence and said i should want to try anything with him, he felt rejected by me and that if he is only going to have sex with me, he doesn't want our sex life to be constrained. So 2 arguments about irrational, unrelated things, and that was in the space of just one day. I'm particularly upset about the airbnb as i couldnt understand how he would take offence at that. he says he's not going to use it and will stay at a campsite instead!! He's heavily implied i am controlling because a)i booked him a couple nights at an airbnb and b)because i expressed a sexual boundary.
Of course, he always says his behaviours are because he love me so much, has never felt this way before, can't control it, etc...
It's just odd and exhausting - right? Things should not be this difficult. I just feel like all my feelings have evaporated :(