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Original poster

Fight or Flight

6 replies

winginitn24 · 30/07/2024 20:15

Why am i constantly stuck in "FLIGHT OR FLIGHT" mode with my fiance?

In his eyes he does no wrong. He questions and has an option about EVERYTHING! Even down to how much ice I put in MY glass.
I could be in the best mode - come home to him and ruin my day! He is so unhappy that he wants everyone around him (well he really wants to be around NO ONE but me) I am a happy person / social butterfly and i feel his main goal EVERY SINGLE DAY IS TO PISS ME OFF AND RUIN MY DAY!

UGH!!!

OP posts:
TipsyJoker · 30/07/2024 20:45

winginitn24 · 30/07/2024 20:15

Why am i constantly stuck in "FLIGHT OR FLIGHT" mode with my fiance?

In his eyes he does no wrong. He questions and has an option about EVERYTHING! Even down to how much ice I put in MY glass.
I could be in the best mode - come home to him and ruin my day! He is so unhappy that he wants everyone around him (well he really wants to be around NO ONE but me) I am a happy person / social butterfly and i feel his main goal EVERY SINGLE DAY IS TO PISS ME OFF AND RUIN MY DAY!

UGH!!!

It’s is. He’s showing you who he is. He doesn’t want you to be happy. He wants you to be miserable, like him. He wants to bring you down so your self esteem crumbles and you become a quiet, placid, subservient, good little girl who does what she’s told and behaves exactly how he likes. He won’t change. Is this the person you want to share this one life with? Or would you rather live free to do what you want without someone constantly questioning you and forcing their unwanted opinions on you?

Sunnydiary · 30/07/2024 20:50

You ask why, but the answer to that is possibly something you already know.

There will probably be a reason why your bar is so low that you are accepting this absolutely shit excuse for a relationship.

Abusive/absent parents? Bullying? Someone or something has knocked your self esteem through the floor.

I really hope you find the strength to leave.

BananaLambo · 30/07/2024 20:54

Why do you want to marry this man? Why does he want to marry you when you irritate him so much?

Pinkflowersxo · 30/07/2024 20:58

Please don't marry him 😔 at least until you no longer feel l this way, it will only get worse after the wedding once he feels like he's "got you "

Shoxfordian · 30/07/2024 21:29

Don't marry someone who makes you feel like that

Onautopilot · 30/07/2024 21:50

Was he like this pre engagement? I hope you have good contraception because if you are his only 'friend ' don't get permanently trapped in this relationship. It's not working for either of you if he is controlling how many ice cubes you use! He wants power over you, don't give it to him - get out.

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