I am in urgent need of advice and a rant!
I am married almost 5 years/together 13 (27 years old) with 2 children (1&3) Work full time from home. Husband “works” also.
Over the past 4 years I have been through hell and back financially but there is a catch not me personally my husband. He started his own business in March 2020 which he decided to tell me 2 days before he quit his job that he was doing this, which I was not happy about as I was pregnant with my first child and I wanted to have a steady income before she came. 2 weeks later the pandemic started and his business was in limbo. However he was bringing some money in but wasn’t a lot, it paid the bills. Further on to 18 months later the business was failing massively and was not working at all so he liquidated the business and the debt that was also occurred in that time.
Since then money has been AWFUL when I mean AWFUL I mean so bloody bad. Since Sept 2022 to now he has had 3 jobs – 2 of which he lost as one of the companies went into liquidation the other one was a stupid sacking.
Now we are in almost aug 2024 and he was been working for this newish company since April. Since then his wages have been late every month. To the point now they owe him almost 3 months money. I have said to take this further but he said NO I will stay with them until they pay as he said they wont pay. He works under the sun for the this company which I have no understanding why he would go above and beyond if he hasn’t been paid for what he has actually done.
This has put a HUGE strain on our relationship to the point I actually resent him, he doesn’t seem bothered by the fact they owe him this money, he isn’t actively looking for another job I am doing this on his behalf to try and get something lined up. I owe my mum and sister hundreds as they have been trying to keep us afloat. My wages cover the kids nursery fees which are a lot, plus the car and general expenses, he covers the household bills and rent.
I generally cannot carry on like this, I am in constant worry every day thinking about money, but if I even mention it he has ago at me. Generally feel like I am clutching at straws, we have been in situations like this before but this time its bad, behind massively on utilities and bills. Shopping every week is a struggle.
Moving on from the money side of things I feel like things are just crap between us, he doesn’t do ANY house work, doesn’t do anything with the kids. I get early every day with the kids, nursery, work, dinner, bath, bed. Literally like a single parent I generally might as well be at this point.
I feel angry all the time but there is no reasoning with him, he just doesn’t do anything to help. Feel like I am stuck in a bubble for the last few years and cannot get out.