Should I call it a day

[Whistledown2]

I have name changed for this post.

Been with partner (don’t live together) just over 3 years both early 60s. In the first 4 months there was lots of intimacy then..nothing. I discussed this very sensitive subject with him, told him how it made me feel (as there was little affection too) and he agreed that he would ‘try’ to do something about it, nothing has been done despite me discussing it on a fairly regular basis. His split from his former partner (love of his life) was traumatic (she finished it). So I guessed this could’ve been a psychological reaction (he was adamant he was attracted to me).

Mostly we get along, share things in common, and have a nice time going out/away. However, he can be quite arrogant and opinionated, and mostly thinks he’s right (hence why he probably does nothing about the above) he’s not a particularly easy character. The ‘relationship’ is at a point where I’m debating bailing out. My self esteem, which is not exactly the best generally is at an all time low due to the lack of intimacy, and though due to my age I might never have another physical relationship, I have become resentful towards him, and feel I should just ditch the whole idea of even just companionship.

I think if he’s making you feel so low and unhappy then there’s no point continuing the relationship.
You don’t need to give up on the idea of companionship, you can still meet someone else but I think this guy has made you believe that you don’t deserve affection or it
intimacy.

Reading your post it looks like you want validation for ending things . You haven’t really posted anything positive about him so I think you already know what toy want to do.

I think if you're already feeling he's not an easy character and noticing he's arrogant and opinionated, then a long term relationship might not be the right thing for you anyway, even apart from the intimacy issue.

I'm afraid so darling.
Its not companionship its wearing you down.
You are more important. x

It's not a relationship anymore is it? Seems like you are giving him what he wants and you get nothing.

Let him go

If he does not add to your life then let him go

Yes I would. Regardless of the lack of intimacy he doesn’t sound that easy to get on with anyway. The split with his ex partner was probably due to the exact same reasons.

Spend time making yourself happy again and building back your self confidence. Go out with friends and find the enjoyment in life again.

Early 60s is not old don’t stay with him be sure you think tbere might be nothing else 💗

I'm getting a 'he's better than nothing' vibe from your post.

But actually, 'nothing' is better than a big-headed know-all who makes you feel unattractive and undeserving because of his own deficiencies.

What joy does this man bring to your life? Your post screams ‘I’m settling rather than be on my own’

You know what needs to be done. Free yourself

Thank you for all your replies, pretty much saying the same things.

Yes I think I am settling, which I swore I'd never do again.

I know what I need to do, it's the doing it that's the difficult bit.

Strength to you.
Warmest wishes.

Don’t ever settle for crumbs, by the looks of it you are doing this yet again. Do not be your own worst enemy by doing that to yourself. Better to be on your own than to be this badly accompanied. Love your own self for a change.