Monotonous love

[Thecherryhotel]

I've been in a relationship since my late teens and am now in my early thirties. Over the years, I’ve started feeling bored, yet this relationship is all I’ve ever known. I can't help but think there's more to life than this, but I'm unsure if that's true.

For example, I've been expressing my desire to be more active and lose weight. However, tonight I’m unwell, and despite having bought an easy meal for us, my partner ordered pizza and beer and has been asleep on the sofa since 8pm.

I also asked him what he wanted to do this weekend and he just shrugged. Since I’m unwell, I had hoped we could discuss him making some time for himself while DS is with his grandparents for a couple of hours. This would allow me some time to rest and for them to spend time together, but he didn’t seem interested.

We have a 3 YO DS together, and financially, I can't afford to live on my own. I felt similarly about five years ago, but now I have even more responsibilities and ties to him. I'm uncertain if I can commit to continuing this way for the years to come.

What would you do right now?

Talk to him. Tell him how you feel. It sounds as if you’re both stuck in a rut. He needs to make more of an effort with your DS so you can have more time to do things for yourself. You should be seeing friends, doing things you enjoy, having some me time. I would suggest that you talk to him about how you feel and tell him what you need from him. It also sounds like you could use some couple time too. You need to get some spontaneity into your relationship. Do you have anyone who could babysit once a month so you can spend uninterrupted time together? Plan some cool stuff to do together. It doesn’t have to be fancy or expensive but get creative. He will thank you for it too.

Ask yourself what it is exactly that you get from the relationship.

Definitely talk to him, maybe see a counsellor.... don't give up yet though.

Monotonous Love sounds like a shit Ed Sheeran song.

Perhaps be more forceful. He's got lazy and needs springing back into life, he needs to know you're getting unhappy and want some excitement back.