Hi. After 20 years of happy marriage we have a problem . My wife had some mental breakdown after 40th birthday. She felt neglected , unloved etc. there is a 55 year old man grooming her because she is vulnerable and she allowed for his affection. They have connection and had 2 meetings and a kiss. I know about everything and my kids . We had many conversations over last few . She knows she have to brake any intentional contact with him . He knows that I know . He agreed to brake contact between them and respected that . I know I can't be pushy , clingy or needy now. I'm super hurt and angry. We always had strong relationships and we both know what we have done wrong . She promised she do everything to fix herself from this mindset , but she don't know exactly what she feels. She don't fell like herself. I'm sure that she knows exactly what she feels and wants. she is probably torn between me and him . Person with money house and horses. Everything she ever wanted. I think she is in fairytale mode and can't think reasonably. The worst part she is not regretting anything and I can't see any glimpse or shame or guilt . Yes she making me lunch to work first time in years, nice dinners . She hugs me in bed sometimes when I acting like I'm asleep . But often she is indifferent to me . It's not woman I knew for 20 years. I tried to convince her she need therapist and we need couple therapy , but she don't want to make any moves . She is saying she go in her own time when she is ready . What do I do now ? I still love her so much. We had good relationship. Do I wait , give her space and ignore indifference , lack of guilt and regret ? We work opposite shifts and we see eachother only for max 2 days a week . Do I move only to one shift so we can be together every second week? I want to force her to seek therapy but I don't think is good idea.