Husband using KIK and messaging

[damnedifyoudodammedifyoudont]

I recently had an off feeling and checked my husbands phone.
I found hidden (deleted) evidence of sign up to an app for anonymous chat / meet ups and whatsapps from an unsaved number that just said hi with other messages between deleted.
Been together 21 years and never had any issues, he is Mr perfect, great dad, hardworking, shares the household jobs, never so much as caught him using porn before.
We have a happy loving relationship and this has knocked me sideways.
I checked because I noticed him being more cagey with his phone, he has been going to the gym a lot and he also started taking a little more personal care.
It all just added up to an intuitive feeling something wasn't right.
I confronted him and he has outright denied it saying his account was hacked and got angry that I could think it of him.
I let it go initially but I'm not sure what to do next.
Any thoughts appreciated!

No-one would hack someone's phone to post messages and then delete them. What would be the point.

Of course he got angry, it's a great way to shut you down.

I'm sorry OP but it doesn't sound good with the other factors like taking extra care of himself and being cagey around his phone.

I know it's very difficult though because it would be so hard to end a marriage that otherwise seems perfectly good without clear evidence. I think I would act as though I completely accepted his perspective and then waited for more evidence. You need time to process what has happened.

Yes, of course you're right, I don't believe him at all.
We have known each other our whole adult lives, I KNOW he is lying.
I can't quite believe he thinks he can fool me on that. He's acting like nothing was ever said.
I just don't know if I should wait and catch or if it might have been enough to scare him and stop him. Or what to feel really. I just feel sick.

In my experience & from what my female friends have discussed with me KIK is a cheating app, sorry he is cheating or msging with the intention to cheat I'm afraid

His phone was not hacked. He is lying because he is cheating. There's no other plausible reason he would do that.
The thing you have to decide now is if it is acceptable to you to be in a relationship with somebody who is capable of cheating and lying.

Kik is a cheating app. People only use it when they have something to hide due to the anonymity. I'm so sorry. I found it on my husbands phone. We had been together since I was 18, married, 3 children. He was using it to communicate sexually with men he met on chat websites. Buckle up and prepare for the kids and minimising. But please know that when you come out the other side of this you will be stronger and happier living an authentic life. It won't feel like it now but I promise you, everything happens for a reason and it will all be ok in the end.

KIK is a hook up app
I'll be highly suspicious of him
Also hacking is incredibly unlikely

Sorry, I've just seen that this thread has been resurrected. I really hope that you're ok and have found some peace after this shit show, in whatever form that takes.

I feel like kik is used for seedy, shady activities. I remember downloading it as a teenager and it was full of creepy men - there’s a reason men like your husband use it OP. Even with “normal” cheating, why not use traditional messaging apps…

In my professional experience Kik is used most by younger people (and teens in the main). It's an odd place for a grown adult to hang around.