Dirty fingernails - red flag or am I overreacting?

[Icked]

I went on a date with a man a few days ago. While he made a positive impression in some ways, there was something specific about his appearance that has given me the ick. I noticed that when his hands were on the table, there was dirt deeply embedded in his fingernails. The rest of him didn't appear to be dirty, although I can't comment on other, more intimate areas of his body as I haven't seen them. I am concerned that if his nails are that dirty, then those other areas might also be dirty, which would give me the ick even more. What are your thoughts? Would dirty fingernails alone be enough for you to ghost someone or not want another date?

Unless he’s Monty Don and he’s just come from the garden, then yes - you are right to have the ick.
My dp can sometimes have nails like this and I don’t approve, but he’s not going to change.

Gardening?

Is he a mechanic ? Or something similar? I can imagine to would be deeply engrained if he's in a job like that ?

Maybe he enjoys gardening or has a job where dirt can build up in the nails?

What's his job?

Labourers, builders, landscapers etc all tend to have this issue from experience, they also get dry cracked hands a lot, most of the time it's staining rather than actual dirt.

I straight away thought he's been gardening. I wear gloves for certain tasks but still end up with dirt in my nails that even the nail brush doesn't quite help with. If he hasn't been working outside and that's his level of hygiene then you're right to feel the ick.

I'd let this slide if he worked in an oily job, otherwise no. My exh was a gardener but kept his hands immaculate. It's not a good sign in relation to personal hygiene.

What did he say he done for a living? Manual labourer, mechanic etc I could accept to a degree as my DH takes ages scrubbing his hands after work, so if your date was running short on time to get ready I could understand.

I’d agree that it would depend on his job but if it puts you off then you’re entitled to say no to him for any reason you choose.

Depends on his job. My DP runs a manufacturing plant and he is filthy from head to toe most days when he walks in the door. Outside of work (and when he's not doing work on the house, cars etc.) he is immaculate and takes great care of his appearance but sometimes whatever products he has been working with that week are tough to get out of nails / hands.

One thing I would say is he has the most gorgeous feet and toes for a bloke (I have never been a foot person😂). They're always clean, no hairy toes and nails clipped short. Ugly feet and long toe / finger nails are a deal breaker for me!

First dare should be making the best impression. But we all forget things or something. I once went on a date, had a shower, left the house. Waiting in pub and realised I forgot deodorant. It happens.

worth a 2nd date and if everything else is good then see what happens.

My husband is a mechanic. By the end of a fortnight's holiday, his hands will be coming clean, but it honestly takes that long. They are 'clean' (i.e. washed regularly), but they are stained.

If you get properly dirty hands through your work, it's really hard to get them properly clean daily.

I run cross country (in shoes!) but all winter my toenails have ingrained mud that no amount of soaking and scrubbing can shift, it must be even harder when it's your hands and you don't naturally soak them in the shower or bath.

If his hand look washed, that would be OK for me and I do love a working man but if it's not for you, that's OK .

Yeah again. If he is a mechanic, garden printer the dirt could be staining. It won't come off until the skin sheds

If he does manual hard work It can be really hard to get the finger nails completely clear. I say clear because they can be clean but not clear. My dh has staining like this he can scrub and scrub but his fingernails just won't loose that colour. He works hard physically hard and always works hard In the garden so his hands are really taking a hammering.

When I did a floristry/painting job years ago, the underside of my nails was stained even though they were short and clean. (I covered them up with polish). If he works with his hands but is clean overall I might overlook it. Otherwise, yes, ick. I work with a woman (office job) who constantly has dirty nails and unwashed teeth. God knows what downstairs is like.

You'd be surprised what lies beneath a lot of painted acrylic nails these days, you just can't see what's underneath it.

That's one of the reasons I have my gel nails done. I'm a gardener, the gels are surprisingly resilient and I can never get my natural nails looking properly clean

This is my husband too!!

We need to know his job first , before
Commenting ??

Yuck yuck & yuck. If his fingernails are dirty chances are he doesn't wash too often other places which require soap and water which would naturally wash the nails.

over 20 years ago, I used to sit at a desk beside an older male colleague who was very nice but had long grey pointy fingernails and it really grossed me out. I hated handing papers to him or anything that could put me near them. So I would be equally grossed out by this.

Depends on his job and hobby.

My FIL never managed to have properly clean hands until he stopped working.