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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

**AIBU**

1 reply

hopeanddreams · 24/07/2024 08:50

AIBU - Been with my DH 17 years and in the last 6 months intimacy/attention has decreased rapidly. Feels as if everything he knows about me and my body has been forgotten (likes/wants/needs in the bedroom etc). Doing the dance less and less frequently, I make the effort then get left unsatisfied... Discussed it calmly a few times, explained how I'm feeling distant and unwanted etc. Get told 'we are ok' then it continues.
We are very open with phones/ipads etc but in the last week I stumbled across a social media account of his under a fake name, couldn't resist taking a peek at the activity! It is all likes and comments on various scantily clad women/ porn stars etc. AIBU feeling almost cheated on? In my mind this would be ok if our relationship was good as before, but I'm not coping with the thought of him giving all his attention to these women and neglecting me...

OP posts:
Shineabrightlight · 24/07/2024 09:16

I'm not surprised you are upset.
You tried to talk to him about the change in his behaviour towards you and your concerns and he brushed you off.

The fact he used a secret account with a fake name to view these other women shows that he was perfectly aware that his behaviour would be upsetting for you. He was being devious and underhand and it must make you wonder what else he thinks is acceptable to do so long as you don't find out.

Have you talked to him about this account you have found and how it is making you feel?

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