Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Friendship fallout

6 replies

Hazelnus · 23/07/2024 16:47

I made a friend in 6th form in the year 2000. A few years later I did not speak to her for a year as she was quite horrible to me one night. She contacted me out the blue after seeing me in the street one night. She promised it would not happen again. Over the years she would be sarcastic or have digs.

I did not see her from about 2015-2018 as I got involved with my hiking friends. In 2019 she asked to meet up. She was a lot nicer and I thought she had changed. She was still with her abusive boyfriend after 10 years and she said it was not going anywhere a bit like me and my ex. I thought why would you not learn from my mistakes. I blocked her boyfriend ages before that as he was abusive to some friends at a house party the once and he did it another time on my birthday so we left the pub and left them there.

Another time in 2019 we met up and I was out of work for a few months and was very ill health. I was frightened and did not know what it was. She said you are lazy not working. I felt awful. I had always worked and she was judging me for being out of work. I never did that to her when she was signing on years before and she had anxiety and depression. (I have been back at work for 4 years now since then).

A few weeks later she sent me a birthday card and Christmas card and then I blocked her. I read the cards and threw them in the bin straight away. I was so ill back then felt so betrayed and friend would judge and not support me.

I had a nosy at Instagram the other day and she had put 2023 was the worst year of her life. I had to drive down her road today as she still lives with her parents and saw the house is for sale.

It makes me sad as we did have good times at times and why did she have to behave like this. I feel like unblocking her but she may never change and her abusive boyfriend is still with her.

OP posts:
Furore · 23/07/2024 17:38

I think you need to draw a line underneath it and move on. Such is life.

It clearly causes you to have alot of conflicted emotions and you don't need the emotional upset. You can't turn the clock back to when things were great.

WhatNoRaisins · 23/07/2024 17:41

I don't think people change and she's shown you what she's like. It's ok to feel sympathy from afar without feeling able to have a person back in your life.

fluffiphlox · 23/07/2024 17:43

Leave well alone. She sounds awful.

Hazelnus · 23/07/2024 19:34

I since found out her mum died last year of multiple sclerosis. No wonder 2023 was the worst year of her life. She would probably be even worse if I contacted her as she would seem bitter I still have my mum.

OP posts:
Easipeelerie · 23/07/2024 20:30

Keep away from her.

strawberry2017 · 23/07/2024 20:55

Going back is just looking for more drama. Learn from it and move on. Nothing to gain here.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page