Have you ever found anything serious on the dating apps ?

[Pinkflowersxo]

Just curious, I have just left a 9 year relationship which was very abusive. I am not ready to date right now as I'm going through counselling/ healing but I am curious as to how you meet anyone now especially being a mum.

The last time I was single I was 18, young & free. I have my / DC who are 7&6.

I am 28, I do go out occasionally and I do get approached when I go out but usually really sleezy types of men. Apps were not a thing really the last time I was single, I'm just wondering do people really find anything serious on the apps ?

A worry I have is they are more likely to cheat if you end up in a relationship because of the idea of there being many "options". However don't I don't like the types of men that approach me on a night out 🙈🤣

The only 'serious' thing I found was a seriously manipulative fucker who had a string of womens names kept 'just in case'.

I found my wonderful boyfriend. We have a house together now and I am completely confident that he is totally faithful.

I was also hesitant following an abusive relationship - but this really is how people meet now.

In fact, you may be more likely to meet shy men online who wouldn't chat you up in a bar. My partner would rather die than make a woman feel uncomfortable, and I think being on an app meant that he could safely assume that it was ok to express romantic intentions in a way he never would have done IRL.

This was on Bumble - the woman has to make the first move.

Yes, my husband. But I think he was a rare find.

To be clear, it can take a long time to find someone decent. But that's life: most men are shit.

My husband of ten years in tinder

Yes, I met my lovely boyfriend on Bumble over 2 years ago. I went on a lot of dates before him though, no awful ones, I met some nice guys but none right for me until now. I think you just need to grow a thick skin and stick at it. I’m mid 40s and divorced.

Aww this is a really interesting perspective ! I do sometimes think the "nice" guys wouldn't be as likely to come to you at a bar like the player types ! So happy for you ☺️

My partner is an absolute gem. I met him on Tinder 3 years ago. He is a widower, so not quite the usual guy you’d meet. He had been in a 15 year happy marriage before he lost his wife to cancer in their late 30s. He only knows kind and loving. I trust him completely and feel very lucky to have met him.

I did have to kiss a lot of frogs before I found him though.

you need an open mind, a thick skin and a very high bar OP. Good luck if you decide to try it.

My friend met and is now married to a bloke off one ! she could alot of dick pics tho. get a friend to help you with the info and put boundaries on the bio. she put strictly no one night stands dont waste your time. Alot less attention but filtered out alot .
good luck i dont think i could cope with it - wasnt around when i was single. it was an add in the paper !

In my experience, in smaller towns and villages you'll find people who are serious as there's less choice. It's harder in cities. Very much a 'there could be something better' mentality.

I still preferred city dating though as at least there's things to do. If I have to visit our towns one museam again I'll scream xD

Wow that's amazing ☺️

Aww that's lovely ! So happy for you x

My dc are all in their 20s. They consider it to be very normal to meet people on dating apps. One of them is married to the person they met there, as are 2 of their cousins. Many of their friends also met their partners on apps.

The other option of course is to join groups / activities that interest you, where you end up meeting and socialising with other like minded people. Sometimes romances blossom from that, or sometimes someone there, invites you to another event and you meet someone there. If not, you've still have good times and made new friends.

I met my now husband on tinder 8 years ago when I was 23. Now sitting in our lovely house with 2 silly sausage dogs and our 12 week old baby snoozing beside me and my stepdaughter upstairs. He's a total gem and I feel very lucky to have found him

My fiancé. Moving in together later this year and getting married next year :)

My previous relationship was abusive, it's taken a lot for me to trust enough to get to this point.

Just celebrated one year wedding anniversary ... on holiday with both sets of parents and our children. We met on tinder in 2020 ... took a lot of searching but sooo worth it!

Yes my gorgeous fella of 2.5 years , would never have crossed paths IRL ever , met on match and I'd previously been in a 15 year abusive relationship, So very cautious, chatted to lots , but he was my second person I dated from there and it's been everything I ever wanted. So deffo worth a lol I'd say .

I met my husband on tinder 😀 it took A LOT of bad dates before that though!

Yes. I found my now DH on plentyoffish 12 years ago! I was a single mum at the time and let me tell you i had a lot of weird dates before he came along. I was casually dating on there for about 2 years before I snapped him up. Ironically I was about to pack the whole thing in and took 2 days to respond to his message because I was about done with it. So glad I responded to him in the end. He's wonderful!

I met DH on POF 13 years ago.

My partner and I met on Tinder over four years ago. We have both had a lot of failed relationships as we are both a little alternative I guess, and both have our demons..... He is the love of my life, I truly believe this.

He was the only one I actually ever met in person. As soon as he started messaging I knew we have a strong connection - he shares my weirdness. In fact I remember running in to my mom excitedly and saying "wow, you'll never believe what this one is saying over message...."

So I kind of knew from the start that he was the one, really.

I do fear the dating apps have got worse since then though. In my brief time on Tinder I chatted to a fair few blokes who seemed intelligent, gentlemanly and sane, even if I didn't click with them like I did my fella. In contrast, my two closest female friends are on there currently, both lovely, funny, intelligent, strong people (and one of them is conventionally absolutely stunning looking) and both have just had a succession of fuck-boys, dick-pics, catfish and ghosts. They both mainly stay on there for no strings fun now (both pretty liberated sexually) but have more or less given up on the idea of meeting a serious partner on there.....

I do still think I could happen. But if I was single again (as I hope never to be) I wouldn't put all my eggs in the OLD basket if I could possibly help it.....

I met my partner 2.5 years ago on Elite. Had 5-6 dates with different guys before where there was no spark, but we just clicked when we met.

Didn’t feel like I was compromising as I definitely didn’t want to meet a guy with children - I don’t have any for a reason 😂

We now live a gloriously simple life where I feel we are committed and happy together

OLD is a good way of filtering down to what you’re actually looking for - and so much easier to just move on if you’re not feeling comfortable with someone’s behaviour/just not clicking.

I understand why you’re asking though - I had some absolute abominations message me, one openly admitted having a conviction for domestic violence against his ex wife and was offended when I said this wasn’t for me 😂

Same :)

Also after a long term abusive relationship.

honestly, no. I've met plenty of men online/apps and nothing ever lasted more than a few months. Most are there because they're desperate (and it shows), socially inept or nobody wants them IRL because they're abusive/toxic. Thats my honest experience.

Personally no I end up with the dregs lol. But my friend met a really lovely guy and they have been happily married for the past two years so who knows??? If you try online dating just be very very cautious. Keep your wits about you and good luck!!!