I met my partner almost 9 years ago and I'm now 32. I have always kind of felt an imbalance in our relationship and like I hard to work to be good enough for him as he wouldn't be "official" for a very long time. We have lived together for a few years now and feel like we are at a standstill. He has known for a long time that I want to get married and I feel he just keeps putting me off. He had also been very avoidant when it comes to the subject of kids but has recently admitted he really doesn't want them. I am still not 100% sure if I do so that's not a complete deal breaker for me. I think he just doesn't make me feel valued. He is quite dismissive of my opinions and his views are always more important. We spend loads of time with his family and friends but he never spends any time with mine. He rarely helps around the house and again I feel I have to work harder in terms of chores, walking the dog. I also really don't like where we live and want to move but he has outright said he doesn't want to so we're not.
I recently told him I have doubts about our future and I have been unhappy for a while. He's now acting a lot nicer and helping around the house etc. When I asked him what's changed he said it's because I have been nice to him for a change. I think he is trying to bring more to the relationship but I just don't know if I could be happy with him and in a house that I don't like coming home to. I think I am just venting this all out but part of me loves him and wants to try and scared to start over. But the other part of me is worrying that I am just wasting my time here and should get out?