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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Advice on relationship moving fast

4 replies

Ppeter500 · 18/07/2024 15:17

Hi ladies

my DDs father left me. I wasn’t really looking for anyone but my friend had wanted to help me get back out there - one night after too many wines she helped me set up a dating profile and we had a look through. I matched with one man as he was the only person I was attracted too.

we spoke for a few weeks and decided to meet. Hit it off straight away but I’m always pretty wary with men in general. had a few more dates and then slept together. Another date and then I stayed at his home.

it’s been a few months that we’ve been talking and dating. I see him once a week when DDs father has her.

hes lovely, makes me laugh, sex is best I’ve ever had. I explained I don’t want things to move too quickly in terms of moving in etc, I have my LO to think about and anything like that would be years down the line.

he’s fallen pretty hard for me already. Hasn’t had a relationship for a few years, is early 30s like myself. I was a bit taken a back as usually men fall slower than me, but he just says he’s older and wiser and knows what he wants.

he’s mentioned soon he’d like to introduce me to a few friends and then see how it goes and possibly family at some point. I never really had all this with DDs father, we met at 19 so things were very chilled and blase.

is this all moving too fast and seemingly too good to be true? I feel happy and want to just follow my heart for once but constantly reminded of that saying that things which burn bright burn quickly …

I will never ever put DD in danger she wouldn’t meet a partner of mine until I was 100% sure and definitely not until they’d met my friends and parents. I’m very sensible when it comes to my LO and maybe a bit too protective. But would rather be that way.

would be interest to know thoughts ….

OP posts:
Bananalanacake · 18/07/2024 15:46

Give it at least a year before he meets your DD. And well done on putting your foot down about not moving in, give it a good few years, if he respects your boundaries he will wait as long as it takes.

DontBother123 · 18/07/2024 16:34

He’s saying at some point, not right now.

IdLikeToBeAFraser · 18/07/2024 16:42

he’s mentioned soon he’d like to introduce me to a few friends and then see how it goes and possibly family at some point. I never really had all this with DDs father, we met at 19 so things were very chilled and blase.

You've been dating for a few months, it's going well and he's simply suggesting possibly meeting some friends and, in due course, his family? And he's not pushing to meet your DD, move in etc?

I don' tthink this is moving too fast at all. I am not sure why you are concerned.

Ppeter500 · 18/07/2024 21:39

Thanks ladies I think it’s more that he will sometimes say things like he’s certain that I’m the one and that I have all the qualities he’d look for in a wife. Things like that make me think it’s just moving too fast!!

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