Friends with ex husband?

[Mothersmith89]

Is anyone friends with their ex husband?

I ended things 4 months ago, mainly because we felt like brother/sister or friends more than lovers. The thought of sex just turned me off so bad.

We tried couples therapy but my heart wasn’t in it.

We have one son and still live together on and off at the moment and it’s fine really.

We even had our family hols and are planning another. Has this happened to anyone else?

I keep wondering if we are friends and get on fine, is that even a bad relationship? but I don’t think I can go back on what I’ve said now!

anyone else had this?

Yes, I know a couple of people who have managed it successfully and it’s brilliant for the children.

Do you mean you want to stay living together as friends on the same house?
I don't think it's possible long term, what happens if one of you meets someone else?

Ex dp and i have 2 dc and are good friends.
He even has the kids and dogs for us when dh and I go away for breaks.

I did not take what I was entitled to from the sale of our house as it was his inheritance and he insisted I took more to get me aet up and helped me since when I needed it.

We parent really well together and the key to this is we are both reasonable people and there's not bad feelings

No one cheated or abused the other, we just fell out of love.

You need 2 decent people to be friends and co parent closely after a relationship breakdown which isn't possible for everyone due to the others behaviour etc so while it is ideal and god for the kids, it is not
Always possible

I think it's absolutely possible to be friends after a divorce if everything goes amicably.
However, I'd warn you not to become in any way dependant on this friendship. Because as friendly as you are now, all of that can change in a heartbeat. I've seen it happen. Two exes who co-parent incredibly well and have all these great ideas on how to be a functional family for the children. Then bam, one of them meets someone else and all these great ideas come flying out of the window because they now have a new person to make plans with and this new person comes first.
You can't be going on family holidays together with a new boyfriend or girlfriend, can you? And then those holidays you were going to be celebrating together, well what if the new partner doesn't like that idea or has different traditions.
Just make sure that you enjoy this friendship and co-parenting journey as long as you can. BUT, be prepared for when it's over. Have a written parenting agreement in place with custody and visitations mapped out for the next decade. Include as many details as you can, because if there's ever any trouble between you, you don't want to be fighting over these things. Don't rely solely on each other's good will for babysitting on your night out or during a school holiday. You need to have structures in place just in case one day he starts saying that he's not helping you anymore.

Thank you this is really great advice

I'm very good friends with DD1 dad, known him since i was 14 and DD is 29 now! We all had xmas dinner together last year.

The same cant be said for my exh!

In your case i would be very very wary of still continuing as a 'family unit'. Its still very new and you need cooling off time to discover the new you AND the new relationship you will have with your ex.

Things can change very quickly when a new partner comes on to the scene so be wary.