Married 25 years. Deteriorating relationship for the last 10+ but has really gone to hell in the past 2. I've tried to talk to him, tried to explain my issues. (Mum of 4, he travels with work, I'm the fulcrum of everyone's lives. He takes no responsibility for pets/kids. I feel he does as little as he can-passive parenting, passive everything TBH). He has mostly just either shut when I've tried to discuss or we've gone round in circles. I feel he argues about how I argue, we get absolutely nowhere. He finally agreed to counselling approx 1 year ago, he was to sort. Nada. Diddly squat. He has put more effort into his relationships with our kids, admittedly but not enough & too late. Our eldest is an adult.. He's well pissed off about the lack of sex, but instead of asking why (I don't respect him, resentment is the strongest emotion I have had for him for a v long time) he complains. I'm so tired of it all. I'm at the tail end of a v long, demanding professional course that I've felt unsupported throughout. I want this sorted now, I need closure. He will not engage. Shuts me down. I know full well he will drag his heels through a divorce, blaming me as I'll have to take the lead. I'd be very happy if he'd leave-he has a second home (family place) which he uses frequently for work. But I can guarantee if I ask him to leave, he'll say no. I feel he always does the opposite of what I'd like him to do...I feel like I'm going to implode if this stalemate continues and I really don't want to upset the kids. I need to work like a trojan for the next few months & this is impacting my focus. I feel like I need to move on now-I can't think about anything else, I'm always so angry with him. If I leave him and the kids where does that leave me in terms of custody etc?