Upset and angry

[moolady1977]

My exp called it a day on the 20th of June by text message the exact message read ' I'm done come get your stuff ' this happened 5 days after losing my dsdad and when I needed him most he switched off his phone then I got this day's later . I'm angry I'm upset and when I tried to speak to him about why ,all I got was that I'd sided with my dmum over something she had said 2 days after my dsdad passed , at the time I was struggling to remember what day it was and whether I'd taken my meds never mind something my dmum had said . I know it's over and there is no going back but it still hurts like mad even though I'm so angry with him

Sorry, nothing worse than your partner siding with your parents. Maybe he wasn't the right person for you. Sorry to hear about your DS dad death.

Sorry I ment to write their parents not your parents.

My other half has done this and I was on the verge of leaving.

He texted you I’m done, get your stuff because you sided with your mum on something over him? I obviously don’t know any of the details of what it was, but this is bonkers behaviour!! How long have you been together??

If he loved you at all, he would not dump you via text or over this issue or at all at a time of grief for you. The fact he’s done all three is a big red flag and I would feel glad to be rid of someone so selfish and hotheaded.

As for advice, just re-read what you wrote when it gets hard, tell yourself how many more times this would happen in the future if you let it slide this time, how much he clearly disrespects you and how unhappy you would be if you stayed. Then allow yourself space and time to grieve the end of the relationship you wanted (whilst recognising it isn’t the one you actually had given his behaviour)

I’m so sorry to hear about your DSD OP.
Spend quality time with your DM and other family and good friends.

Your ex is a twat and you are well rid of him. Sounds like he didn’t like the fact that noone was giving him attention and that he was supposed to support you. Very narcissistic of him. Likely this means he will try and hoover you back in when he’s decided you’ve had enough time to grieve and he doesn’t have you support you through it. Make sure he is blocked on every device and platform so you don’t get sucked back into it with him.

💐

@Lmnop22 we had been together 7 years , from what my mum has said she was saying he sounded like someone and I laughed .
@Catoo this is the second time it's happened , the first time we were apart for a couple of weeks until he begged me to come back which I did , this time there is no going back my stuff is being stored by my kids and I'm done he isn't going to put a wedge between me and my mum .

Glad to hear it. He’s trying to train you into never asking any support from him and to put him first always.

Narcs have a crazy fragile ego and when it’s offended you get punished. They only want you for what you can provide. If you stop providing it for any reason, even bereavement, they leave. What a way to be!

Well done on choosing DM.

Get the blocks in place. He will be back.

🌸