DD is 6 and has recently started overnights with her dad. He is abusive and has been to her also. He has 1 night EOW.
I have done my utmost to promote contact, spoken positively about it, included her father in special occasions when he had limited supervised contact only. I do not criticise or denigrate her father. I allude to her father and I communicating also so she has a perception of a positive co-parenting relationship.
DD is struggling, she hates going, she hates being there and from the minute she's there to the minute she leaves she asks to come home. She tells her dad she misses me and is told that mummy doesn't miss her. There have been a number of concerns that DD has also raised that have triggered safeguarding at school which the courts haven't taken seriously.
Handovers have been awful, clinging, crying, begging and effectively forcing her to go.
I'm not asking what I can do to stop her going as I can't, it's court ordered. I am asking if it gets better and what I can do to make it better when her abusive father is a toxic co-parent, doesn't listen, doesn't communicate, doesn't take her to parties or events so she misses out a lot on things. I understand he has limited contact and doesn't want to be ferrying her around etc, but this is an abuser and there is a reason why he has limited contact. He hasn't changed and will never change, not even for her.
DD is now really rejecting him, I arranged for some summer holiday contact to take place which she is utterly distraught about, I was asked by CAFCASS if I would be offering contact in the holidays which I felt I had to - she doesn't want to go.
I feel like I am failing her. She has mostly enjoyed the supervised contact but it feels like there is now a very untoward shift where he is trying to damage her relationship with me by filling her head up with things such as mummy is bad, doesn't miss you and does things to upset you etc..
I just want to make things better for her. How can I?