Clash of our coparenting schedules

[Hennypen321]

I have recently met someone and we have discovered that we have our children on opposite weekends.

We can have one completely kidfree night a week, in the week. Then we can also have 1-2 nights where one of us comes to the others house once child is asleep.

I guess I'm trying to not overthink it but if we really like each other, is it going to be sustainable. We can have the option of a babysitter if we wanted to do something on a weekend too but that does take away our time with our child.

Anyone with previous experience?

Can either/both of you adjust your schedules so you have the children at the same time?

That's not something I can ask for until I'm 100% sure we are going to be longterm, and likely it would be refused as my child's father has a partner who has a child and they have got it all set up so they have their children the same weekend.

if it’s early days I think that sounds fine, once a week while dating is more than enough, if in time things get more serious, you can weigh up some other options. But cross that bridge if and when you come to it, and just enjoy what you have now.

Am guessing they are young? Mine are teens so probably a lot easier.

At first I got into a relationship where our plans matched a bit, but to be honest after a month we had no issues in being round others house with kids. Ex started a relationship with someone the kids already knew and his rota did clash a lot. Like you say, I think most was the 'missing out time".

She did ask to change but I said no as we were going through a tough time with things she had said about me to friends and our financial agreement. But, fast forward to a few months ago, both of us were talking well and she asked in a nice way if we could look at it, we did and changed it. So that depends on your relationship with the dad.

Thanks guys, I think I'm overthinking this as we are only just past a month seeing each other.

My relationship with my child's father has been awful due to his previous abuse, but things are improving between us and as we have just sold the house we owned together and that's going to help us just focus on our child and what's best for them.

We have the same weekends/routine for 3yrs, if we swapped weekends it would mean them having to swap his partners child routine too.

Thank you

Can your new partner not swap weekends?