I can't leave my threatening husband

[mama678910]

I feel stuck! Husband is threatening to abduct my child if I get divorced.

I know if he gets shared custody he will 100% leave the country with my son. Has anyone been in this position? He will go to his home country where they have no extradition laws. I don't know what to do. I have literally 0 rights. I feel like I have to go through hell of emotional and psychological abuse everyday which I will to keep my son.

Oh OP that’s so awful. Can you get proper legal advice? How old is your son and does he have a passport?

Are you based in the UK? Are you and your child safe tonight? Contact Women's aid straight away if not.

What region or country will he go to? Do you have a relationship with his family or will they take his side?

Yes I am safe. Armenia is his home country. His mom wouldn't per se take his side but he does what he wants so she really doesn't matter.

Does your DC have a passport currently?

Yes it's with me!

Ask a friend to stash the passport and get proper legal advice.

Hi so you need to keep your cards close to your chest pretend everything is fine while you get your ducks in a row. Has he done anything that could be seen by the court not to be in the best interests of your child. You could apply for a prohibited steps order now to prevent him taking child and I'd apply for a residence order. You need legal advice if you can afford it vardags is excellent for family law Sloane Curtis I think I heard was good. Whatever you do don't flea you will get in trouble for abduction it's a criminal offence but of course it takes time for police to act 28 days if a parent takes a child. So as your married you both automatically get Parental Responsibility in law even if husband is not named on certificate both of you can go outside of the UK legally with your child for up to 28 days. You could contact womens aid. Can you elaborate any further do you have any family. Has anything been happening like financial control etc. Hope you are ok x

Agree with another poster hide the passport it gives a little time.

Are you able to get him/his passport flagged as an abduction risk?

both of you can go outside of the UK legally with your child for up to 28 days

I don't think this is correct. Per gov.uk, "You can take a child abroad for 28 days without getting permission if a child arrangement order says the child must live with you, unless a court order says you can’t."

OP doesn't have a CAO and neither does her H. Both therefore need the consent of the other to take DC out of the country.

Armenia is a Hague Convention country, which I'm guessing your H doesn't know, @mama678910 so there are laws about child abduction.

I would try to contact Women's Aid or Rights of Women to see if they can point you towards a solicitor who can advise on the best course of action for you. Could your DC have an Armenian passport as well?

I would be destroying that passport or putting it in a friends safe.

Then you leave and get it on record with the police that he is abusive and you are scared for yours and your sons safety. Tell them about the flight risk concerns.

Can you go somewhere he won't find you? Or live with family for a while to be safe?

OP can you phone Rights of Women and get some advice?

I found some info here
https://childlawadvice.org.uk/information-pages/abduction/#:~:text=Where%20there%20is%20risk%20of,will%20need%20a%20C100%20form.

You can take a child for 28 days where there is no court order in place without permission of the other parent. Sadly I know this because my husbands ex wife has taken his daughter abroad to live without his consent the police can't do anything for 28 days even with proof.@tribpot

How old is your son?

https://www.reunite.org/prevention-of-abduction/

You should get some information there. And also contact womens aid

No my son hasn't got an Armenian passport. But I know husband wants him to have dual citizenship which I'm trying to avoid at all costs.

I'm trying to figure out what I'm doing but he is getting more threatening, which is scaring me. I have family but he knows where they live and he would be knocking on the door first thing. I will try to get in touch with a solicitor. I just feel like divorce will make things 1000x worse and he will eventually take my baby. So I'm trying to stay in this relationship. I don't want to share custody but will have no choice and I can't live with that knowing that he might take my son.

Can you speak to Womens Aid for advice?

me. I have family but he knows where they live and he would be knocking on the door first thing.

This is what women's refuges are for. You need to consider it.

You cannot control the situation by staying. It will escalate. He's clearly not remotely reasonable. He's actually really abusive.

Be strong.

Destroy it and let the passport office know he shouldn't get another one for fears of abduction

Then leave him

I'd be asking a solicitor to store it securely for me.

If the passport is missing then he can apply for another one. Better to get a prohibitive steps order to prevent DC from being able to leave the country.

You need to get an appointment with a solicitor and women's aid. Please update us hope you are safe x

OP, what documents does he need to apply for the Armenian passport?

I.e. can he easily get those documents and apply for the passport for your child without your knowledge? For example he could order another original birth certificate etc and apply?

Just something to check out and be prepared for as he could then travel with your child on an Armenian passport out of UK