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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Help I’m stuck

2 replies

ThatCoralBiscuit · 01/07/2024 18:46

I’ve been married for 23 years, 3 children , one with severe needs. Ever since covid my husband has slept on the sofa every night and all intimacy has gone. I feel sad and rejected. He will watch porn instead of being with me.
I try to make things better, but he just says that our daughter ( who doesn’t talk or do anything independently) has made everything difficult.
I try to organise meals and to do stuff but he ignores it. He won’t even do basic stuff like food shopping, or planning meals together because he has just adopted this diet where he only has shakes and no food.
i go to the supermarket and get jealous of couples.
I cannot live in a sexless marriage anymore, I am 44 and I feel so sad and lonely.
I have a good network of friends and an opportunity to move into accommodation at my work soon, so he could stay in our house
i have got friends both male and female, and the easiness of some of those friendships makes me realise what I am missing, ( particularly with some of the males who care in a way that my husband never does)
I would be prepared to try to go to counselling but he will not. To make it worse, I’m due to go on our family holiday with our teens soon. . The thought of being together on a road trip all together with no escape feels me with dread

OP posts:
MounjaroUser · 01/07/2024 18:50

What sort of accommodation could you move into? Would you lose it if you happened to lose your job? Could the children move in with you?

Also (sorry for all the questions!) do you own or rent your current house? I wouldn't leave him in a house I owned.

ThatCoralBiscuit · 01/07/2024 19:06

It’s a 3 bedroom flat that comes with the job. So if lost the job I would lose it.
i cannot be in the same place as a man who clearly does not love me and just want to live like housemates.
and the thought of going on holiday with him makes my skin crawl but I cannot cancel now.

OP posts:
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