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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I hate my emotionally abusive, controlling Dad so much

2 replies

ihateitheree · 29/06/2024 14:01

My Dad is horrendous. He is aggressive, controlling and emotionally abusive. He has been so over protective of me that I struggle so much in my adult life. I've lost friendships because of it, as there were so many things I 'wasn't allowed' to go to with friends like music festivals, holidays, etc. I've never had a relationship as he has completely put me off them and men completely. He's been unemployed for years with my Mum and I financially supporting him, he is so controlling and emotionally abusive to her but she can't get rid of him as he'd be homeless, and he would make our lives a living hell - he'd make slanderous reports to our employers, post awful stuff on social media, contact all of our family and friends. I know this because he has already done some of those things in the past.

He's completely immature; there is something fundamentally wrong with him. I don't know what it is, but he cannot see he is ever in the wrong. He had an affair and somehow it was our fault?

I still live with my parents as my jobs in the past haven't paid enough for me to even afford to live in a house share. But, to be honest, I think deep down I haven't wanted to move out as I would feel like I'm abandoning my Mum and sister. But I finally have a good job that pays well, and I will be able to afford to move out in a few months.

I don't even know what I'm wanting to get out of this post; I just have to get it off my chest.

OP posts:
cupcaske123 · 29/06/2024 14:07

Congratulations on the new job OP. You can continue to support your mum and sister even if you move out.

Do you think your mum would be open to speaking to her local domestic abuse organisation or one of the national ones for support or advice?

Bananalanacake · 29/06/2024 14:27

Definitely move out, it's your life. good luck

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