Post divorce relationship age 50s - what next

[Windowsdontshut]

Curious to get people’s take on this. Have been seeing a man for just under 2 yrs. Both v happy. Both divorced, his adult kids have left home, and I have a DD age 14, who’ll obviously be living at home for a while yet, at least until she’s 18. We’re at different life stages in that sense.

We don’t talk about the living together bit, or what the future plans are, but I’d like to. I’m not even sure what I want at this stage as my focus is DD and getting her through school, but I’d like some idea of his commitment to me. How do I ask this?! I’m thinking in 5 years I’d like to move in together but this seems so far off and abstract that it seems silly to have the conversation. Yet, somehow, it seems important!

After two years you should be able to talk about anything. Like ‘do you see us living together at some stage in the future?’ It might also open conversations about how/if you protect assets for your respective children if that’s important to either of you.

I woud do this asap. If I was him I may not want to wait 5 years to move in so you could both waste a lot of time. Is there any reason you cant move in sooner if he was up for that?

If I was with someone I knew was 'the one' I would be looking to move in with them but it would depend on finances and kids (i.e. I have 13/16, if they have same that means a big house - if their kids have left then it makes it easier possibly).

I'm in a similar position, long distance relationship 2.5 years, both around 50. My son is 12, I'm a single parent and do not want to live with anyone until he has left home. My boyfriend is fine with that. We talk vaguely of buying a place together one day, him moving to my area and even retiring together but it is so far away, there are so many variables, it's impossible to plan at this stage. We just enjoy the moment for now

Does seem important to have the conversation. We might have very different ideas - although obviously I’m hoping we don’t!
We talked about living together once, lightly, (I brought it up) and he said he could see it, but certainly no plans have been made. Im not even sure that’s what I want tbh - I’ve lived on my own as a LP for so long. Not sure what the next phase looks like. Im also worried he’s goi g to get more stuck in his ways now his kids have both left home. He’s 60 next year, I’m 53.

I've been with my DP for longer and we still live apart. His kids are older than mine but I still don't know if I want to actually live with him all the time. I love my space, my independence and I enjoy being with him ... but not all the time.
I want to do my own hobbies and sleep in my own bed alone from time to time.
So I am unsure how to play this or whether we'll just gradually merge households...
No answers sorry OP!