Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Good book for a young woman in an abusive relationship

4 replies

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 21/06/2024 10:45

I employ a very young woman at work. She is roughly the same age as my daughter, so I can't help but feel somewhat protective towards her. I don't know much about her personal circumstances but I am aware that she has a challenging relationship with her mother and stepfather, and I think she still lives with them. I understand that her father died when she was very young.

She has disclosed to her line manager (and a number of other colleagues) that she is in an abusive relationship. I don't know much detail. Her line manager is supporting her and will direct her to sources of support. The employee is quite timid and I don't think she would feel comfortable talking to me because of my position in the organisation. So I wondered about leaving a book on her desk (in an envelope for privacy), and whether anyone might have any suggestions of books that might help her... I'm sure I have seen stuff recommended on here previously. I would be happy to leave a note saying that it was from me if appropriate.

Please tell me if this is a really bad idea. I just want to help if I can. She is young, vulnerable and has her whole life ahead of her...I can't bear to think of her getting trapped in an abusive relationship.

TIA

OP posts:
AliceCallous · 21/06/2024 11:22

I'd get Why Does He Do That? by Lundy Bancroft. It goes into all the myths and assumptions about why abuse happens, which would likely be very useful information for her. No doubt she believes something that this book will help her have clarity on.

I think it's a good idea for you to help. It doesn't sound like she has a supportive adult in her family.

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 21/06/2024 11:43

@AliceCallous, thank you for your thoughts and for the suggestion. I will have a look for that book.

OP posts:
Fulshaw · 21/06/2024 16:08

I wonder if a fiction book might be the way to go? Something like It Ends With Us by Colleen Hoover - the main character is in an abusive relationship but it takes time for her to realise and then gather the courage to leave. There’ll be others. Might be more subtle and she might be less self-conscious reading it.

WalterLouSunset · 21/06/2024 16:14

Proust

New posts on this thread. Refresh page