Introducing DC - when and how?

[Allnewtometoo]

I've been single since my dc were babies. Coming up for 7 years. No relationships of note in that time (1 minor dalliance with an ex, 1 brief fwb).

Have met someone out of the blue 6 months ago. Having been quite happy on my own, not looking/longing for anyone. Never done OLD. This is all a huge surprise to me!

I would never rush into introducing DC to anyone. Having met someone I really really like has made me think about how and when it should happen.

They have only ever known me and them. No memory of exh living with us. See their dad once a week, this is increasing now though with more over nights which is good for everyone.

New chap is older, his children grown up. So a different scenario his side.

Dc don't yet know I'm seeing someone.

Any advice on how to navigate this?

Same as any other friend, meet in the park, have them round for a meal, whatever.

How old are the children? 8ish? I think, a gradual introduction with no labels is fine. Just a friendly walk, or supper at yours. No need to attach bell's and whistles. Gradually add more time spent with him. Moving in or anything is a long way off at 6 months so I wouldn't worry too much. Children that age adapt quite quickly. How will your ex take it, will he be supportive with the children when it comes to this? Does he have a partner?

We (me and ex) dont have a good relationship. He doesn't talk to me (while I waskeen to be civil) . I dont think he has a partner, children have never mentioned anything and he appears not to have moved on at all.

Yes eldest is 8. New partner is very much into outdoors stuff, as are we so there will be plenty we can do together to get the ball rolling.

I'm sad that my dc haven't seen a loving and affectionate relationship. But worry how they'd feel about it.

I have been really lucky to have an amazing step dad (and no he's not their step dad and won't be for years to come, if ever) and don't want to mess it up

Why not start with telling them that you have a boyfriend, or at least someone who you might like to be your boyfriend and see how they react? They might ask to meet him or they might be upset or nervous about what it means. Their reactions can then guide your next steps.

That's a good idea thank you.