Phones and relationships

[WhatDoID0]

Me and my boyfriend only see each other on the weekend and I always picture us having quality time together. But we seem to just sit on our phones for hours on end. I’ve asked to go for walks in the past but he finds it boring, and going out is always “too expensive”.

even if we put TV on, he just puts on sports channels that he knows I don’t like. So we end up on our phones. I fucking hate it so much. When I’ve tried to bring it up, he says “there aren’t always things to do, some days are just boring”, but that seems like most days to be honest. What do I do? :(

You need a new boyfriend. This one is faulty.

Put this one back … sounds boring !!!

You are offering a walk at no cost and he still says no and puts on sport that you don’t like?!?! What do you see in him?!?

@AquaFurball damn that made me laugh

@PivotPivotmakingmargaritas I don’t know at this point, I think I have attachment issues hahaha

He sounds really dull.

Well he sounds like a barrel of laughs!

How long have you been together? Honestly, sitting together glued to your phones sounds like what teenagers might do when they hang out. Essentially it sounds like you're not compatible.

@yellowsmileyface haha yeah it feels like that, I’m early 20s and he’s late 20s. It doesn’t feel like we are adults sometimes.

I mean, yeah, your boyfriend sounds dull and passive but so do you. I wouldn't think watching TV together is 'quality time', either. Why do neither of you actually take the initiative to leave the house when you are finally together? Why don't you talk about things to do together before you actually meet? That's what I'd do.

The scourge of modern life. Life and relationships were much better prior to smartphones. A walk is a much nicer idea, shame he doesnt share your opinion.

He is dull. Throw him back and find another one.

I had this in my previous relationship.
Ended it.

We'd go absolute weeks without barely saying two words to eachother 😂
Now, I'm with someone who barely touches his phone. Neither of us have social media.
We talk a lot.
We watch telly together.
It's so nice to actually be present and feel like you have someone's undivided attention rather than half arsed because they are too engrossed in their phones.

Phones are the devil, and have the ability to screw a relationship

TV is the thing people do once they've exhausted all other options isn't it? My wife and I struggle to find anything we both like to watch, but due to various ailments, it's sometimes the only option available. I'd infinitely rather be out doing something else though. She would too.

I'm a massive homebody and love quiet days in with my husband and this sounds excruciatingly dull even to me.

Surely you can do better for yourself than someone who is the personification of the colour grey?

What is the point to him ?

@MonsteraMama i too love my creature comforts but yeah, glad I’m not crazy. It’s painful

@MonsteraMama i too love my creature comforts but yeah, glad I’m not crazy. It’s painful

@HappiestSleeping i agree, I’m a very adventurous person and I said at the start I’m not a TV person, but I seem to have lost myself a bit

I love watching tv or reading. DH loves watching sport or listening to podcasts. We are both perfectly capable of doing those things without the other one and we don't have a lot of money to be out and about plus live is crazy with work, DC etc.

But... and this is the big one.... we talk and chat and laugh ALL THE TIME. Our relationship is based on this ongoing, never ending dialogue of shared opinions and stories and moments. If we didn't ever talk to each other or share anything, what would be the point? 1

I love watching tv and am a homebody and pretty boring. But your BF makes me look exciting. I love watching a tv program together so we can talk about it/laugh at it or whatever. But I would also want to get out every once in a while and do something together. Even just walking the around the shopping centers, taking a drive, finding a park or something. Not everything costs money.

You probably think there's something you can do to change him, but there's nothing. He'll always revert back to this, because this is who he is.

I thought you were at least in your late 30s when I was reading, and was picturing 40s, and feeling sorry for you (I'm nearly 60). You are in your 20s!!!

My god, you are wasting your youth stuck inside all weekend! dump him and get out there!

Just chuck him back and find one more suited to what YOU want to do.

I agree with you, what's the point of this? Me and DP rarely ever touch our when phones together. mind, we don't live together but its just not either of our bags. We'll watch something together every so often but most of the time we talk, go out for walks, do stuff together. It does sound like you've gradually fallen into something that just isn't very 'you'

I had one like this OP, we lasted 18 months. It was so dreadfully dull. The one time he acquiesced and went for a walk with me, he made it so miserable that I never asked him again - he had a face like a slapped backside, refused to make conversation, and ruined what could have been a lovely 40 minute park walk in the sunshine. We got back to mine and he got straight back into bed to watch the telly.

Ugh.

I don't miss him, and you may well also find you feel the same when you inevitably end your relationship - because there's no way you see this boring man as being the love of your life, is there?

Go get your life back! End it, reignite all the sparks from all the things you used to do and find more fun things too. You won't regret it - and weekends are prime-time. !💐

Bloody hell. You're in the marriage, pipe and slippers rut already and you're not even living together!

Where do you see this relationship going? Can you see a long term future with this guy? Sitting on the sofa watching sport and being glued to your phones