I’m the problem. I know it. And I don’t really care.

[DamnitImTired]

Not looking for someone to tell me I’m wrong or right. I pretty much know the problem is me.

I would honestly rather spend my time with my husband and dogs at home than entertain his adult children and their partners or my own parents.

There is nothing wrong with these people. They are genuinely nice enough people. I just don’t like having them in my space.

Unfortunately my lack of enthusiasm for their company oozes out of me. I wish I had a switch (like my husband does) where you could feign interest for a few hours.

I don’t seem to mind our friends but family… urgh. I know I’m the problem here. My patience for their quirks and the small talk is minuscule. Maybe I just never learnt the art of small talk.

What would you like a prize?

I’m totally u@DamnitImTired

As someone who’s adult dcs have a similar situation with their dads partner, they will know and you’re hurting of them.

Good to know I’m not alone!

if there is a prize for someone owning who they are and recognizing their own shortcomings … yes please!

OP, do you feel there's something you should be doing about this? Or are you OK with it?

My new step son in law just commented how he doesn’t really like someone else’s company because they and I quote… ‘just know everything about everything and it’s so annoying!’

im sure he could read what I was thinking just by looking at my face 😂😂😂

Yes probably! There is something to be said for the art of small talk and I just struggle.

Just make a bit of an effort, it doesn’t take much.

Thanks. I think I’ve been better today than I usually am.

Puts hand up

i think on a sub conscious level friends are people you seek out because you enjoy their company and have things in common.
family seems to just be there whether you like it or not.

I understand that for some people their families (referring to grown up families) are their preferred choice of company but i think that those people just get lucky when they find the things they enjoy and like in friends in their own families.

If her family members have an attitude like yours, no wonder she doesn't want to see them.

I'm not the slightest bit interested in my DH's grandchildren. Luckily I rarely see them and when they do visit, make myself busy elsewhere in the house. I completely understand OP.

I can tell you're not autistic. Socialising taking "not much effort" is neurotypical privilege

Most humans are tedious and YANBU in finding them hard to tolerate.

You sound like someone I could tolerate 😂😂😂

I've been like this since Perimenopause I do try to be sociable but the struggle is real!

Hard agree!

My husband is similar, we used to go out occasionally, see friends, have them and family over, BBQs and the like.

But nowadays he really just can't be bothered, house, garden stuff that I can't do, and other things that I won't go into,
He's told me this!,

He works hard, he's a self employed car mechanic, very good at what he does, he has a huge client base.
Works 7am - 7pm most days, plus Saturday's and most Sundays, we don't see a lot of him, never have, even when the kids were little.

Unfortunately I personally think it's selfish.