Is this manipulative?

[Tiddlesem]

Is it a form of gaslighting or manipulation when someone insists on doing things for you but then are subsequently moody and short with you after like you've done something wrong when they insisted on doing said thing? It's a pattern of behaviour I've noticed with my partner that I don't know how to address. He has been known in the past for being moody and giving me silent treatment but has gotten better.

It's a form of martyrdom - https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/inviting-monkey-tea/202102/when-youre-in-relationship-martyr

His mother is the same, talks about things she has done for people but in a very negative angry manner and how they don't do anything back for her. He's definitely like his mom in that respect.

Yes, my ex used to do this and it is manipulative. He'd get pissed off if I did something by myself without asking for help, then he'd also get pissed off when I did ask for help, saying stuff like "ffs, I don't know why I'm being made to do this".

It was just one of many games I could never win. Basically he wanted me to feel guilty either way.

How long have you and your partner been together?

The silent treatment and moodiness are big red flags. You say it's gotten better, but going by your post it seems like he's switched one emotionally abusive tactic for another.