Partner accused me of emotionally blackmailing him.

[Fortheloveof83]

This just sounds so ridiculous to me. I should add my partner is ND so may explain some of it. I merely mentioned this morning that he has never changed his Facebook profile picture. He has a picture of his nieces (they are lovely). He uses FB a fair bit. We have been together 4 years and have a toddler together and I just said how come you’ve never changed the picture in so many years and not included your daughter. He has now changed his picture but said I have emotionally blackmailed him to do so.

Have I? I never intended him to remove his nieces was just commenting how old the profile picture was and how come not used one with his daughter. He uploads pictures of us so that’s not an issue.

You have not. Blackmail involves a threat; you just made a passing comment. He chose to take it the wrong way and go into a huff.

I’m not sure emotional blackmail is the right word but you definitely brought it up to make him feel guilty so that he would change it.

You didn’t force him to though and so he can’t blame you for making him do it if you didn’t.

I didn’t do it to guilt trip him into changing it. It’s been 4 years if I wanted to I probably could have a long time ago. I was just wondering what the reason for having his nieces and not his daughter was.

Why does there need to be a specific reason.

I have my cat up and not my DD and have done for years.

I don’t think anyone would question because why would they, it’s just a profile picture.

I think a family pet is different to someone elses child and not your own. In my opinion anyway. It’s not like it’s been changed between ours and them, it’s never been our own child, or me. But I’m not bothered about that.

I’m pretty sure if I let rip they would just go see I told you she was trouble and crazy. Can’t win so I’ve silently walked away.

Is he generally pretty high drama? Or fixated on treating your relationship like one long competition/argument? Or quick to belittle or shame you or dismiss your needs?

If not, I'd chalk this up to a rare strop. Everyone had the occasional off day.

If this is reflective of him in general though then.stop using autism as an excuse to stay.

Partners are supposed to maje your life more comfortable and more fun, and add support to your your life. If they don't or they do the opposite...probably time to go.