I keep looking at my neighbour....he's quite yummy ( i am married )

[isotiredtoday]

As i say , married over 20 years , been really tough last few years with dh mh issues , iv stopped trying now and lost interest as its 100% me making any effort , i get breadcrumbs from him. and yes ive had this conversation with dh multiple times But lately noticed my neighbour 😶now i cant stop having thoughts and wondering , im not that person , am i ?

Is this normal or common ?

Your marriage isn't great, you've got sexuality that is being rebuffed by your husband so you've found a new focus. It's probably normal and it doesn't make you a bad person. You just have to decide what you're going to do about it, if anything.

Is it time to split up and be single again.

Who knows perhaps the neighbour may end up more than that. Especially if you or DH move away so no shitting on own doorstep...

@GigiAnnna thank you , i told him multiple times how important intimacy is for me , and again recently said quite bluntly our sex life was awful , the sex is good but he never initiates and he sleeps so much literally 7-7 , lucky if its once a month at best , he says hes not bothered has low libido and that's just him 😟

Im thinking if i dont bother trying , i wont feel desperate and disappointed , i actually do feel better in myself which is nice , obviously i want to be wanted but cant force things , since i stopped trying i feel better . sounds odd but its the truth.

but i keep wondering of there's someone who would want me in that way ....

Of course there will be men who fancy you and will shag you.

I'd strongly advise you to leave the neighbour alone tho! You need to turn your imagination more to the various horrible messy ways that is likely to end.

You need to end your marriage or agree an open relationship or something (but even if you did get a pass to shag, avoid neighbours!).