Can you live in the women's refuge when not in immediate threat

[Emiliariveraorteguez]

I've been the victim of narc abuse in childhood (no contact), and several unsafe males since. I have no support, and I'm deeply traumatised and vulnerable. I've approached my sons school for a CAF referral. I believe how badly vulnerable and traumatised I am, that living in the women's refuge and having therapy would be the best idea. I struggle living alone and unsafe males keep abusing me in my desperate search for friends.

I'm not currently with a male, but feel dangerously vulnerable. Is it possible to go and live there when you are not in immediate danger? I feel like I am in immediate danger, as I cannot protect myself from men and it's a repeated problem.

I don't think so, no.

You do urgently need help though. Have you spoken to Women's Aid?

I wouldn’t have said it was the right location for you based on what you’ve said. How old is your son?

I'm sorry to hear this but I don't think so either. Have you spoken to women's aid? That would be a good place to start.

No you can’t

Who are the unsafe males around you that are causing you harm? If you are experiencing domestic abuse from anyone, it doesn't have to be a partner, a risk assessment is completed by a professional. This is called a DASH.
If the risk scores high you will be able to go into a refuge.

The refuge might not necessarily be 'male' free.

no, that is not what woman's refuges are for, and it is not the environment you are looking for, either.

what outcome do you want from a CAF report? This seems a strange thing to request. You are asking for an investigation into how the school can best work with you to educate your son? I am struggling to understand why you would want such and investigation.

No you would not be eligible

Until a risk assessment is completed no one knows the OPs circumstances.
There is a website for professionals to find refuges throughout the UK for women only. Some refuges have self contained flats some are shared. Some refuges are staffed 24/7 for complex needs, some are staffed 9-5 with support on the phone out of hours.
Again until the OPs needs are known it is impossible to say whether or not she will be able to go into a refuge.

Depending on his age your son might not be able to go to the refuge with you.

Speak to your GP as they can refer you to the relevant therapies and also talk to Women's Aid who might be able to help.

Is it family members of friends, romantic partners or colleagues that you feel unsafe with?

Women's refuge places are quite difficult to get here in the South West . I had a DASH assessment done and my housing officer did try hard to get me a place in a refuge two years ago but alas , no place was found and I was moved into emergency housing . There was an immediate risk to my welfare and the person involved was a MAPPA offender so I was instantly assessed as being MAGVA . Even with all this evidence and police involvement ( they escorted me to all appointments ) I was moved into a hostel .
I sympathise with what you're saying .. definitely ring Women's Aid and hopefully they can signpost you to something appropriate .
You sound very anxious . Hope you're able to get some rest x

No, spaces are at a premium so they need to prioritise women in immediate danger. I’m sure women’s aid will be able to help, with courses and perhaps counselling

A refuge won't be the right place for you to live, however WA may still be able to help you.

They often have support workers that go to houses, or they have access to support groups.

Do reach out to them and see what support there is in your area.

I hear what you're saying and I think that women's Aid can help but not with a bed in the refuge which is reserved for those in physical danger and resources are a bit slim at the moment.
You can call Womens Aid or look at their online resources which you can start tonight. There's the Freedom Programme which might spark some connection for you. More details here
Your local refuge will also be able to offer other resources to help you.
I hope you find some help xx

I don't think so - spaces are extremely limited so you shouldn't take a space from a woman in a immediate danger (especially physical)