Friend with benefit but…

[Joyfase]

I was hoping to find a fwb type situation. Maybe more. I haven’t been single that long. I guess I like my freedom. I went on a date after a stressful few months. I had spoken to the guy a few times all seemed fine. The date was crazy. He seemed erratic and possibly on drugs. I am a very sensible person and I don’t know why I didn’t run away screaming! But it turned into a fun date where we laughed a lot. I wasn’t intending to ever see him again. But we have been in touch only by message. But I am tempted by fwb with him. Part of me cares about him. Part of me likes that he would be a temporary fwb as he is due to move away because of his job. He is complicated I just like the idea of an escape. Online dating has been hard work lately. Am I crazy?

Don’t do it. For a start I don’t think you should go into it thinking ‘maybe more’. That’s the opposite of FWB.

And don’t even get me started on the ‘possibly on drugs’ part. This should be extremely off putting. A deal breaker.

You don’t ’care about him’ - you’ve met him once. The very fact that you say this so soon means you won’t cope well when he moves away. You’re getting way ahead of yourself, a recipe for disaster. FWB requires that there are minimal feelings involved and you’re already so far past this point.

Also ‘he is complicated’ - 🚩🚩🚩

@Joyfase Am I crazy?

Only if you pursue this! 😂
Seriously, this is not a good bet. People are usually on their best behaviour on first dates, and you saw "erratic, complicated and possibly on drugs."
Doesn't sound like a fun FWB to me, OP. You don't know what he's going to bring to the party.

Bet he has an STD.

Maybe counter-intuitive but I think for FWB you need to be sure the other person is pretty happy and secure to begin with- it’s not necessarily the easiest set up to manage if emotions get involved so the last thing you want is someone unpredictable and troubled. You’ve met once and describe him as “erratic and possibly on drugs”. I’d probably give this one a skip, plenty of other blokes out there for no strings sex.

You’re all correct. I think I just saw the fun side. But since then have realised the complicated side. Yes I need to find someone else there is plenty of others out there. Thank you.