Am I dating too soon?

[Erlouise]

Hi all
my partner left me about a month ago and I have a 7 month old.
we weren’t intimate for over a year and we didn’t really say much more than two words to each other over the last 6 months. Ever since DD was born he’s just hated me.
I have missed companionship and I have been so lonely.

I met a guy while I was out and about the other day and he’s asked me for a date. I’ve said I’ll think about it. is it too soon to just go on a date?
I feel I shouldn’t but my friends have said that it’s not the fact the separation happened a month ago it’s the fact that the relationship has been failing for a year and half and there’s no reason why I shouldn’t enjoy myself.

AIBU thinking it might be nice to go on a date?

You say your ex 'hated you' since your child was born and yet only left recently. Not even, that you kicked him out.

I'd be worried that here you are lonely, newly single, a single mum...vulnerable. vulnerable to dangerous sorts of men who view you as catnip.

I want to say 'do what you fancy, you deserve something light and fun'. But I worry that you might not be in a safe frame of mind for that atm if he turns out to be a wrong'un.

Loneliness can make us take risks, overlooking red flags.

Also, having just left someone who hated you (which I'm assuming, presented it as cruelty). You may not have healthy self esteem amd, you may be more inclined to fall for a love bomber.

I think I'd take another 6 months. Spend it focusing on you, learning how to spot red flags. Being kind to yourself. With girl mates ideally.

Perhaps you could say 'thankyou, i appreciate the offer but I'm not ready to date right now. I will keep your number though and when that changes perhaps I could drop you a message?'. Dont agree to any 'just friends' beginnings. Because he doesn't actually want that and it's just potential fir boundary pushing.

Sounds to quick for me but then I've been single 7 years since my ex left so the opposite end and most people probably think that's too long 🤷‍♀️