Hello!
Ex was smitten initially but dumped me at 11 months for what I thought was no reason. Didn't hear from him again. 40. Until that point, saw him daily, went on holiday, met the family, we had tickets booked etc.
I was heartbroken - especially since he started dating a woman 2 months later (I was still crying!) and at 11 months I've just learned she has moved in (friends of friends, he was blocked pronto).
I don't want him back, I've moved on etc but I'm left reeling.
I suspect I'm a bit stung by 'why her?' but that's irrelevant - maybe they're more compatible.
The thing is, I don't think she was the OW. But reflecting on our relationship I read it all wrong. He was king of mixed messages. He looks murderous in pix of us together (how did I not see it?!), he would be critical of me randomly for what was fundamentally my personality, but also he did all these nice things.
This started at about 4 months into our relationship so - and this is a serious Q - why not just end things?
I know you need time to get to know someone, but what was his game? I had him pegged as a committementphobe but apparently he's not.
Do other people do this? Spend seven months at 40 with someone they never really had any intention of pursuing something with, only to fast-track the next relationship? It makes me a bit stressed.
TIA!