I feel very stuck.
I am in a 10 year relationship with one toddler. Increasingly it has become apparent that I do 90% of the upholding of our lives. Everything from finances to making sure we don't just sit on our bums watching telly every weekend is somehow my responsibility.
Over the past 7 or 8 months I have been communicating my frustration with my partner, who is incredibly passive and while he says he does understands the disparity in our relationship and agrees he should do more.....he doesn't take any action to change things.
I've done everything, an itemised list of things I feel responsible for, and action plan done with him to identify specific ways to improve, shouting, crying, you name it I've done it. But nothing inspires change.
The thing is he's not an unkind man. He is patient and an excellent father. I used to say he was the kindest person I had ever met and I would gush about him to anyone who would listen. But I don't feel like this anymore.
More recently I have set a deadline. If X,Y, Z isn't done by August I want him to sleep elsewhere but remain present for our child. But setting this deadline has my head in a spin because now I'm assuming I'm about to be single and I'm wondering whose out there. This is most likely an avoidance thing because I genuinely am devastated about it all and I can't begin to think how I would manage as a single parent. But I can't stop thinking about it and have such an urge to download tinder to see what's out there. I won't do this as it would be incredibly hurtful in a situation where there is already so much hurt and sadness.
I just need to vent somewhere and wonder what others would do in my situation?
For info, I can't necessarily afford to be a single parent, not cam my partner....which makes it all the more difficult to figure out how we even could split.