Hi,
this is my first time posting on here, I’m unsure what I’m looking to gain from this, maybe just some support and reassurance.
I am planning to leave my dp (have been living together but wouldn’t say we have been in a relationship for around around 6 months).
He has been abusive towards me in the past, I stupidly gave him one more chance after months of me leaving him as I believed he had changed, his family also thought he had changed, I now know he will NEVER change.
We currently live in a rented home with our DD, however I have bought a house without his knowledge and should be able to move in around 3 weeks, he will not be coming.
just abit of background about him and his treatment of me.
he is extremely aggressive towards me, mainly verbal but has been physical in the past.
constantly calls me awful names and degrades me, fat, ugly, big nose, rubbish mum, the list goes on, he has probably insulted me on every single part of my body and personality.
I pay for everything, bills, rent, food, everything for our daughter.
he hates my family and says awful things about them.
he shouts, screams and swears at me if I do anything that he dosent agree with or sometimes just for no reason.
he laughs at me when I’m upset or crying, he blames me for everything that has gone wrong in his life.
he takes drugs (cannabis and cocaine), which probably accounts for his mood swings. He refuses to get help for this.
there’s much more that has happened over the course of the past 5 years and it would take me hours to write it all, but that’s just a bit of background.
the last time I left I knew in the back of my head that I shouldn’t let him back in but I really believed he had changed and so did his family, he fooled everyone. His behaviour went back to normal within about 2 weeks and I knew I had made a mistake but then I couldn’t get him out.
i am so ready to leave now and never go back, I do not love him anymore and I just want the best for my DD which is not to be around abuse. He acts like he loves DD, although dosent actually provide any care for her and I’m unable to leave him alone with her as I don’t trust him so I’m her main carer and look after her 24/7 apart from when I’m working.
im not actually scared to leave because I feel nothing for him anymore, but I am scared of the repercussions and what he might do, he dosent know I’ve bought a house and won’t know where it is but will probably eventually find us.
he also says he has videos of me on his phone when he’s wound me up that much I’ve responded by scratching or pushing him, these videos make me look crazy and unstable but he hasn’t videoed the hours of abuse he has given me beforehand. I’m scared he will use these against me once I’ve left and may somehow get custody of our DD, he is very manipulative and can present as charming and ‘normal’.
sorry this is long, I just want some reassurance that everything will be ok for me and my DD
thankyou x