Dh and I almost divorced however we are trying to work things out, we have been separated for 5/6 mths and he has been living with his mum but is due to move into a rental flat this week, he was so adamant it was over and then suddenly it wasn't and he wanted to work things out. He has been staying over a lot and things have been good but I've been getting a niggly unhappy feeling when he's here.
I'm scared of a lot of things, that I can't trust him and that he can turn round and walk again lots of thing, we are doing relate and the last session she suggested we each have time to talk with no interuptions from the other person and I did it first he wrote things down and was supposed to go away think about it and come back and respond, this was almost 2wks ago and he hasn't. He seems happy enough to do the happy family thing but still sort of clams up when I try to talk to him. The talk was important to me and I'm disappointed that he hasn't responded.
He also is kind of keeping things from his mum but I feel we are both grown ups and should be able to explain to people we are tentatively working things out. I feel so mixed up and have to say I was looking forward to the fact he wasn't here for a few days (what does that say)
I'm now questioning how I feel about him, in the split when things were bad and we argued we both said some hurtful things however during the times when I begged/pleaded him to at least consider working things out he was in all honesty quite horrible to me and I really don't think I can forgive it. There is also no intimacy between us and I realise that this is going to take time however we have great sex but no cuddling afterwards and a couple of nights ago I think he must have guessed how I was feeling about it. Am I just expecting too much to soon, sometimes I feel he has the best of both worlds and everything is on his terms so how do I turn things round?