Boyfriend travelling

[MayasJam]

I have been with my boyfriend for 1.5 years. He is currently travelling round Asia for 3 weeks. He is moving around a lot so lots of travel time and being away from WiFi spots.

how often would you expect to hear from him?

Hmm, when DH and I were dating he went away traveling with his mates for 3 weeks to Bali. From memory he would send a WhatsApp to check in at least once a day, usually it would be a good morning then a
Good night text.

Have you not heard from your BF in a while OP?

I wouldn’t expect to hear from someone if they’re only away for 3 weeks

I have heard from him, we’ve been sending WhatsApp’s a few times a day and I’ve spoken to him on the phone too - which has been more than I was expecting considering circumstances!

I was speaking to a friend last night and she was saying it’s not enough and most people would expect more effort.

A few times a day isn't enough effort???? He's meant to be travelling, exploring. Sometimes he'll be in places that he can't get a signal. A few times a day is more than I'd expect!

I have a feeling your friend is trying to stir. Do they have form for trying to undermine your relationship or make you worried about things?

Ignore your friend.

I’d probably send my DH a morning text and evening one and would be basically to let him know I’m alive! If I was seeing someone it would probably be every couple of days because I was there to travel and explore not be tethered to a boyfriend

When I travel without DH, sometimes all he gets is a "good night" message. I don't have roaming so it's WiFi dependent. Time zones and WiFi strength permitting, I will try to voice call occasionally. Two or three messages a day sounds plenty to me.

Your friend is an idiot.

Whats your bf supposed to do? Live stream his holiday? Sit in his hotel talking to you all day?

Tell her to give her head a wobble. . Speaking to him several times a day is fine. Let him enjoy his holiday.

I'd expect a once a day check in message or a few pics just as an 'im alive' but maybe every couple of days a phone call at most. Your mate is ott, how./ much more does she think it should be?

The truth is everyone has different boundaries and expectations, so it doesn't matter what your friend thinks as long as you're happy with it.

To be honest, hardly at all. He's travelling - he's not thinking about home. Back in the good old days, people went on holiday to properly get away - no communication at all, and it was so relaxing. I really miss that.

Once a day, at the very most.

What your friend thinks is as irrelevant as my opinion too.

What are you comfortable with? Communicate this to your BF.

Probably an average of once a day.

There isn't a definite amount. Too many variables. Aside from the obvious connection/signal issues, it is massively relationship dependent. I could happily go 3 weeks with very minimal contact from DH, but we have been married over 20 years.

Once a day, if that! Your friend is a complete moron.

was speaking to a friend last night and she was saying it’s not enough and most people would expect more effort

There are 'no rules' about what 'most people' would expect. What you friend is saying is what she/he would expect - which might be completely different from you or indeed anyone else you speak to would want.

To be honest, hardly at all. He's travelling - he's not thinking about home. Back in the good old days, people went on holiday to properly get away - no communication at all, and it was so relaxing. I really miss that.

And this.

Yes that was my thinking, he’s there to enjoy his holiday not be worried about back home.

hes away with an organised group tour, not with friends. I’m not sure if she’s thinking it’s people I don’t know and should be worried about that? He went on one in Europe a few weeks after we first met and everything was fine so I’m more comfortable with it I think.

thanks everyone for the sense check.

Once a day text sounds reasonable with the occasional longer call if he can find a good patch of signal.

A morning and evening text seems good. I used to avoid spending much time on my phone when I was backpacking (but then again I was single then). The quick phone call once every few days or a couple texts a day seems good.

Christ, me and DP can go days without messaging each other when we're on separate holidays. I don't think you've got anything to worry about OP

Personally my DH or I would check in every time we got on Wi-Fi under those circumstances, but wouldn't expect contact as it's impossible to predict when you'll find it.

M