Hello everyone,
I have posted on this topic before. I had a NC stance with my parents which has now resumed to limited contact of monthly visits for an hour. This NC for over a year or so has helped tremendously. Whilst in an ideal world NC is almost certainly what to do forever, I have decided not to sever all ties and I think monthly visit of an hour is what I can manage.
That being said, I have maintained this since Dec '23. Five reasonable visits have been done ,my husband accompanies me as they behave better when an "outsider" is present.
My mums has 'cottoned on' to my regular timings now of monthly visits towards the end of the month and last wk was 'trying' to manipulate the visit, in her very usual manipulative way. To get to the point I didn't go y'day , she came up with her usual lies when she finally got back to me. I accepted her lies with a polite 'ok no prob.' This was then met with her trying to call me thereafter. I didn't respond.
My question to you is...
I now want to stick with my boundary of contacting them again at the end of next month in June. May's visit isn't going to happen now. I dont want to get into her 'drama' of rearranging a date. This gives her room to call/msg/complain/ cry/rearrange again etc This is her usual behaviour. Suits me in one way as I get to NOT see them for another month now.
There will be comments/put downs if I leave it another month but I am so well versed is answers to her mean comments now that I can handle them pretty damn well.
I know many of you may think and write just cut them off, but I am not as I said going to do that. So in the situation I am trying to navigate , does it seem reasonable to not go now til June?
I do hope this is clear. Many thanks!