I am hoping someone can offer their own thoughts around this if they have been there themselves and how they handled it.
My relationship with my DM has been strained and gradually got worse over the last few years, this is due to her own issues including being a heavy drinker. For the last 18 months or so when I was still living at home I was walking on egg shells and could never rely or trust on her for anything, due to her behaviour while drunk/hungover and even sober but always tried everything to help and support her which was always thrown back in my face.
Myself and DP have recently moved into our first home after a long wait and are couldn't be happier. But the moving in excitement was ruined by my DM behaviour, the days before moving in (we already had keys but wanted to clean the house ect) she was constantly sending messages such as telling me I couldn't get my possessions from her house and that I was a horrible nasty person ect. So I chose to move earlier than planned so I could make sure I had everything. She was awful when I told her I was going sooner and was throwing my stuff into the street and screaming abuse at me.
We are now in the house and have been for a number of weeks and couldn't be happier here. I have since had limited contact with DM as emotions have been all over the place, feelings of hurt, sadness, relief to finally be free of that behaviour. But despite asking her and telling her I need space to process everything she continues to message every few days with 'I know you hate me but...' and it's nearly always to try and play some mind games or start an argument. But I really feel done. I've realised how much she has ruined different life events these last few years which I had pushed to the back of my mind, how I've never had privacy living with her, she's always made me feel like shit for having my own life. I look now and realise I don't recognise her as my DM anymore as the person she is now and has been these last few years is a different character altogether, but while I was living with her, once in a while I would get my lovely mother back for a day or so before she turned nasty again and I think that's what I've clung to for so long.
I guess after all that bumbling on what I'm trying to say is, has anyone ever stayed LC or gone NC with their DM and how did it play out for you? Like did you sit them down and explain why you wanted that?
Any help appreciated, thank you