Do the wrong people bring out the worst in you for everyone or is it just me?

[Somethingstupiddone]

Is this a normal thing? Does everyone have bad parts of themselves that come out with the wrong people?

No. I avoid those people

I tend to stay away from people I don’t like

@Maddy70 but if you didn’t is it normal for the parts of you to appear that aren’t nice?

If I really can't avoid them as in colleagues for example, no, I remain true to myself and don't let them grind me down.

It's not easy though!

I cut out some friends for this reason. I didn't like who I was when I was around them, and I realised they probably wouldn't like me if I was just myself, so the whole thing was bad for me. Felt very freeing to just let them go.

It doesn't happen because im not around them so no. Life is too short to be a shitty version of yourself

Yes , I noticed this when I’m dating. My ex brought out the worst in me. I knew when I resorted to being that way we could never be together.

So everyone has the capacity of not being or feeling so nice in the wrong company? I know the answer is to remove yourself but I just wondered if it was a normal thing.

Yup my SIL and her kids … they are aggressive and annoying I get so frustrated that I end up snapping and then I’m the bad guy but it’s literally me well past my last tether not putting up with her kids bad behaviour and them enabling it…. I now avoid them as I know that they grate on me

Some people are weak-willed and easily led, yes, but then others aren't. Everyone is different.

@PivotPivotmakingmargaritas See my brain would not let this go and would wonder if the problem was that I had a short tether of they are too wild and keep putting up with it! I’ve not learnt that it doesn’t matter who’s the wrong side.

I think if you turn into an entirely different person around some people, especially if the person you turn into isn't someone you're happy to be, you need to ask yourself why you're so changeable or easily led...?

Yes normal.
Normal in the sense that we all have the capacity to react badly or think unpleasantly.
How far from your usual persona that is depends on your character and upbringing.
How easily and how far into it you go there (if it is not your usual persona) depends on how easily the person you are with pushes your buttons, what triggers you personally have, how aware you are of it happening (is your guard up), how far from other aspects of your personality it is etc etc.
But in theory anyone could be a shitty version of themselves in certain situations.

Yes, which is why it is more common when you are younger and still learning about people and yourself, and gets less common as you get older and learn to manage yourself and others to avoid having your personality flicked like a switch.

@BedDepartment for me it’s trauma, it’s a bit raw still.

I don't think this happens to me. When around toxic people I become quiet and know that the best thing to do is to keep away from them. But they don't bring out the worst in me in the sense that I change my behaviour to others.

Is your trauma specifically linked to a certain type of person?

Hell yeah it's normal! But not just the negative side. I have one ex colleague who I really like, but is a negative Nelly and brings out the glass half empty me. Another colleague brings out the cheeky in me and I have no idea how or why. One of my Girl Guides brings out the sarcasm.

Yes. Limit your time with these people or try not to be alone for long with them. I think some personalities are harder to get on with than others. They say the only person you can control is yourself. If you have to deal with them, trying making sure you're in a good position to deal with them