Hi! A bit embarrassed to come here and moan but I don’t have many friends and no family..
so for context I have 3 children, 2 from previous relationship (10,8 boys) and a 1year old girl from my now boyfriend he only has one child (with me).
He is currently working on a zero hours contract and for a few weeks hasn’t had much or any work, he still gets his top up from UC.
he is a few years younger than me and has taken to my children well. When we go food shopping he likes brand names and the more expensive food. He just adds to the trolley, then when it’s time to pay he just walks off leaving me to foot the bill.
he likes to cook so I give him free reign in the kitchen but he doesn’t clear anything away and the kitchen is always absolutely filthy - all the counters are covered in oil, sauce, onion and garlic peel everything he has used is everywhere and after dinner he will go have a bath/watch tv or go and lay on his phone in bed all while all 3 children are awake needing baths etc. our daughter will be following me around crying and he will not get her until I’ve moaned about it or I’ve been a bit passive aggressive towards him and made a snarky comment about me being the default parent/ or I’d love to lay in bed. He will then kick off if I’ve made one of these comments in front of my elder children (I don’t mean to and I understand his point) it’s just so frustrating that he can hear his daughter in distress and won’t think let me get her give her a cuddle or something! Just so I can clean the mess he’s made. He also won’t empty the bath after he’s used it which I find so disgusting and on the weekend our daughter threw the ps5 controller in his full dirty bath water and I know he’s not going to replace it, it will be me as I’m the one who brought it for my sons last Christmas. Last night I admit I lost it, he has an awful habit of drinking out of the milk carton in the fridge and like I’ve said he doesn’t put things away he left it on the side table next to the sofa and it fell and was half full and it went upside down, our daughter still has a night time bottle and it was empty the time I found it and I stormed down stairs and I said that there’s no milk baby can’t have any it’s going to be a long night all because he didn’t have the respect to put it back.he did go to the shop and use his own money to buy some milk. But I slept in my sons bed with him. I took all 3 kids on the school run this morning and I’ve come back and he’s taken all his stuff and gone, no message no call no note nothing. Now I have to admit I feel a bit relieved but I’m hurt and he will no doubt say it was my attitude that made him leave without seeing what got me to that point. I will add and I’m so sorry this is a long read if anyone care, but talking about him not paying makes me very uncomfortable because I was a single mother before him and I was never this broke before but I just thought he would at least provide some things for our daughter but doesn’t.
move messaged him to say no call or text? But no response.
thank you for reading, I am so sorry it’s so long. I think I just needed to vent as I said in the beginning I don’t really have any friends and I don’t have any family to speak to.
thanks again!