Alcohol problems

[Frenchgooner67]

My gf has an issue with alcohol, she regularly gets drunk, and often does not remember anything. This came to a head recently when she began giving my loads of abuse after she was drunk, this happened 3 times in 10 days. On Monday we had a big chat, i said i was not happy about the situation, and things had to change. She was sorry, and promised to try, i pointed out her inability to handle alcohol, and her reaction to it after just 2 or 3 drinks, and asked her to just try and control her intake. So fast forward today, we are on our way to our new house do some work before moving in next weekend (which ive paid for, with help from my sister. she was going to give me half the cost of the house when her inheritance comes through in a few months) . Anyway its midday and she gets a message from her brother that they are at the pub, she suggested going for a coffee, before we go to the house, i said ok. She then orders a beer, and i had a coffee, i said just one as we've got a lot to do. we finish our drinks and i go to get up and leave and her brother buys her another. I said we'll im going to make a start on the work and she says she'll finish her drink and be along. well that was 9 hours ago, and no sign of her. I've come home now, and ive decided i'm leaving, i've packed up my stuff and its in the my van. now having second thoughts, and dont know what to do for the best. im gonna struggle to pay back my sister on my own, and will probably have to sell it. just dont know what to do for the best.

If what you say is how it is then your gf might have low self control when it comes to alcohol. It's easy to pack up and avoid the situation however it'll only get messier from there on in. Emotional pull between two people (when one has dependency issues and the other not) can be challenging. You have to look after yourself and what is right for you. Deep down you'll know.

Hello! I'm so sorry you're having this stress..

But leaving at this time is best, you can always just decide to have a break until she's well. Addiction is a horrid thing and they won't stop until they want to stop.. and it sounds like she doesn't want to stop.

If you can leave and financially handle it even if it's hard then please do. She let you down horribly and if you keep helping her or paying things (which you'll have to do in the future if this carries on) and putting up with more be more of her neglect and abuse then you are just enabling her to act that way and she won't respect you for it.

Good luck! It's not an easy thing to walk away, but your peace of mind and security in your relationship is the price she isn't willing to pay right now.

This woman’s primary relationship is with drink, not you and it’s never been with you either. She’s an alcoholic and you asking her to cut back on her intake was about as effective an action of peeing in the ocean. You also cannot police someone else’s drinking.

The 3cs of alcoholism are you did not cause it, you cannot control it and you cannot cure it.

What is the situation now re the property?. What made you ever want to move in with her at all given she is a drunkard?. Sell the property and return to your sister her share of the money.