What would you think?

[mummaloo2]

Looking for some opinions.

So it's been a bit of a stressful time for my partner, and Friday night he decided to tell me he isn't happy in our relationship and he might as well go live on his own. He woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me this, so I said I couldn't take in what he was saying. So he said we'd speak in the morning.

Yesterday morning, he said nothing. Then he went out to work and text me saying the biggest mistake he ever made was giving up a place he had on his own and only having himself to think of. He then said if he still had his own place, he'd be packing his bags and leaving that afternoon.

I responded saying that he's told me all I need to know and what are we going to do then, as we can't continue to live in the same house.

Within minutes he's phoning me saying he didn't mean what he was saying and he was just lashing out at me.

He then came home, had another rant on. I left to go to the shop, then when I returned he's acting like nothing ever happened. And hasn't mentioned a thing again.

I feel so confused? Would you say the things he said if you didn't mean them?

In your shoes I'd have a high suspicion that he's had his head turned by someone else.

Whatever the reason, he doesn’t care about your feelings. He needs to go, even though you find it difficult right now. What a self centred, manipulative arse he is! So sorry OP 🙁

He means what he's saying as he's said it more than once and then acting like nothing has happened because he doesn't want to be homeless.
Get rid! Don't let him hang around for longer than he needs to!

He means them but he's scared of the reality to follow through with it, so he shits himself and retracts it.

Thank you, I think I know deep down he means it and is just too scared to actually go ahead and be on his own.

What's your housing situation?

If it's your house, boot him out. If you're renting jointly is it affordable for you to rent the place on your own?

@HellonHeels it's a rented property but only in my name that we currently live in.

Pack his bags for him.

Kick him out.

Even you said "he's told me all he needs to"

Pack his bags

He's doing you a favour

I'd also suspect there's someone else

How long have you been together?

Oh if it’s in your name, I’d be telling him that you’ve thought about it and he’s right. Send him some Realestate email addresses and tell him to get on with it. You don’t want to be dragged down by a spineless, immature man who won’t be accountable for his own behaviour.

Has he been paying for his share?

Maybe have a proper chat with him? He could just be down and just ranting - not everything has to be suspicious. We don't really know your situation overall but from what you have said, it doesn't sound too sinister

not everything has to be suspicious

No suspicion needed. He said he wants to move out, that he made a mistake moving in. He doesn't need ulterior motives, he's spoken plainly, twice in a way that would shake any partner (or even housemate) up, and now he's acting like nothing has happened. That's enough to refuse to live with him anymore.

It’s very likely theres someone else but they haven’t committed and aren’t letting him stay with them, so he keeping his options open.

He's testing to see what he can get away with before he turns you into his toy to play with and hurt.

Or he's met someone whose pants he wants to get in to.

Sorry.

Time to take charge and stop waiting for him to tell you what is going to happen.

Well there you go then. He tells you he wants to move out but basically has nowhere to go so he's shutting up and putting up and backpedalling because he's realised if he flounces out, he'll be homeless.

I'm not exactly sure what he thinks YOU are going to do about his living situation if he wants to move out? Find somewhere for him and fund it?

If he does stay, be prepared for him to announce he's moving out - once he's got somewhere else to go.

The only thing you can do is pack his bags and have them ready for him so that he can go in immediately. You can't live like that with him threatening and promising and forgetting.

Rather than jumping the gun and kicking him out as people have said here. Would you do the normal thing and sit him down and ask him what is going on? You said he's been stressed lately? Was this out of the blue?

Thanks for everyone's input, the relationship is now over and he has left the home.