Other half can’t sleep without telly on

[Madge91]

After a bit of advice, as my other half can only fall asleep with the TV on. This was fine until we recently had a baby, as id just wait till he fell asleep (which usually only takes a few minutes) then turn it off. However, he’s struggling now as will often fall asleep downstairs (works long hours and 8 week old baby!) but once he wakes up to come upstairs, he can’t get back to sleep. He doesn’t want to then turn the tv on in the bedroom, as baby (and me) are usually already asleep and the light will sometimes wake her up. We’ve tried going straight to bed but this can sometimes be at 8pm ish if he’s had a particularly long day, so doesn’t always work.

We’ve tried meditation and audiobooks previously, but they’ve not helped or the persons voice can be very irritating, which I have agreed with 😅 Also we will go for a walk after dinner to get some fresh air, hoping this will help. Anyone got any tips/recommendations? It’s driving him mad, as he’d love to finally be able to nod off on his own after 40 years of this!

Perhaps he could try white noise?

Another plus for white noise is it tends to be soothing for babies.

Headphones and play the TV programme on his phone? I sometimes donthis

Definitely headphones and his phone or tablet.

Guided sleep meditation. Sounds stupid I know but they really work.
I have bouts of insomnia and this will sometimes help me. Sometimes I'm beyond help but that's a me problem

My DH is the same. His is for his tinnitus, and he needs the TV on. It's only on a low volume - as others have suggested maybe try white noise.

On Spotify there is a series called twelve hour sleep machine with so many different options. Trains, cafes, rain on a tin roof, every colour of noise, hufflepuff common room.

There is only one advert at the very start even with free Spotify.

I use mindband sleep headphones.

I'm like this, if I have the TV on it stops stupid, trivial thoughts - such as the same line from a song on repeat in my head. I can't use headphones as I'm a front sleeper. Would Mindband headphones be comfy like this @AntiHop?

I am the same but with the radio. It started after the upstairs neighbours put in wooden flooring and would wander around half the night constantly waking me.

The noise from upstairs isn't so bad these days but I have become so used to it that I can't drop off to sleep without it even if I am somewhere else.
If it is the light from the TV that disturbs the baby maybe radio would be better.
I find talk radio like radio 4 or 4 extra the best because it seems to be a more consistent tone usually without sudden loud music.

I often play old radio through iPlayer on my phone. I have been listening to the same Poirot series for the past month, usually nodding off after the first ten minutes. Without the radio I would take hours to fall asleep.

I used to use an under pillow speaker or a pillow with a built in speaker so I don't disturb anyone but I am too hard if hearing these days to use these now.

I wear headband earphones - and watch/ listen to tv shows on my phone and set my timer to turn off my phone in 10 mins. Even with my headphones on I can hear my 2 year old in the baby monitor- and used it when she was much younger too

This. He'll need to turn the phone over though so the light doesn't disturb you or the baby

Also - shower or bath before bed, white noise, lavender pillow spray.
And just persisting with it I guess. I'm telling myself the same as someone who struggles to nap but is expecting my baby to do so!

Same as my husband. But ever since we had baby we sleep separately now also for his work.
I used a sleeping mask and ear buds!

Thanks everyone, these are great tips! We’ve tried white noise, but it drives me mad so that was a no 😂 I’m a silent room and a book kind of person so we are very much the other end of each other! he also feels it’s more a visual thing rather then just noise annoyingly, so I think next step will be iPad and headband earphones. He’d been worried he wouldn’t be able to hear the baby with this, so it’s good to know you still could @PivotPivotmakingmargaritas luckily baby sleeps very well and I’m only up with her once a night now, so just be in emergencies really!

Really need to persist, but he’s an electrician so I get worried about him going into work too tired in case of accidents, so don’t want to be too pushy 🥴

What's all this 'we'? What's HE doing to address his antisocial sleep hygiene?

This is exactly what he says, as soon as sound/light goes off, it’s like his brain wakes up 😅 when he was a kid, his mum had her sewing machine by their room, so he would fall asleep watching and listening to her, so it’s a hard habit to break now

As I mentioned, it drives him mad that he’s like this, and up till having a baby we had gotten into a good routine which worked. But he also needs to take into account what I can also sleep with, so it’s defo a ‘we’ issue currently!

I use one earbud and can definitely still hear the baby!

White noise can actually be very disturbing and cause anxiety in adults and babies. I would try a natural/brown sound like thunderstorm sounds and see if that helps.